I proudly bring to you.... ME!!!!

End Dec

2007-12-28T00:03:00.000+08:00

Its the end of the freaking month.

The so called ''snow" show at work will end soon. Thank god.

Christmas has came and left. And its like it never happened. But this year fruitful. Got shitloads of gifts, compared to last time. Wahaha!!

Bonus came and went too. No idea where it all went too. Damn...

This new year is good. I'm working all the way till 4am. Congrats to me! =.=

Flickering Flame or Eternal Light?

2007-11-13T21:36:00.000+08:00

Watching some dumb silly show. But I still watched it. Maybe because i'm silly.

A flickering flame, that lights and disappears quickly after is more beautiful compared to plain eternal light.

Using up all of its might, giving its very most before disappearing forever is more memorable than something eternal. 短暂的美丽 is the most captivating, that leads people to cherish more.

So... The question of living forever vs dying at say, 80.
The choice is simple following my analogy from above.
Its LIVING FOREVER!

Say hi to PAPA guys =P

Movies and Life

2007-09-22T21:24:00.000+08:00

Watched quite a few movies recently. Secret, Bourne Ultimatum, Mind Hunter, 双龙记.

双龙记 was just normal brainless fighting. Not much to understand except standing in awe at their kickass kungfu.

Mind Hunter was decent. It was gross. It had blood. It had adrenaline flowing and thoughts thinking.

Bourne Ultimatum was like watching this one dude beat the whole world. Don't need much brain for this kind of show.

Secret was.... Rubbish and interesting. So lets call it interesting rubbish. From playing 2 pianos with 2 hands at the same time to finding the one you love by time travelling using a piano. They even have this piano competition where one tries to mimic the other pianist's tunes.
First. Just hearing them play the piano is enough trouble. How the hell you supposed to replicate the damn tune unless you've heard and played every single piece in this world.
Second. Playing 2 pianos with 1 hand each at THE SAME TIME is NONSENSE. Period.
We dont even need to get started on the time travelling part...

Ok. I'm done with my movie review. Now for self analysis.

I... Must... Be... Fucking... FREE!

Updates

2007-09-20T11:34:00.000+08:00

I have updated my bloglist. Dean is no longer a dead link. Hahahaha!

Working has reached a lull period. Night shifts aren't really busy, until this coming Oct. In view that it's going to be damn busy next month, being relaxed now is good.

Working for real has a large difference compared to attachment at PCA. Somehow, I'm happy here and at PCA, it sucked.
I have a one of a kind job up here. Noone breathes air as fresh as mine, with 2 different enchanting views to boot. Not much office politics except for the bitch who does nothing but talk and command.

Who's game to join me at the mountains? hahahah

Sentosa

2007-09-12T21:31:00.000+08:00

Went sentosa today. Was decent. Walked around, enjoyed the sights and the views, and basically relaxed. Albeit a little boring...

Most of the rides and tours went from average to boring. Only the luge is good. Fast cornerings is the shit!

Ok. More of the better stuff will not be said here. Till next time! =)

Cable Car on The Mountain Top

2007-08-20T01:37:00.000+08:00

Burnt my first Sunday on Mt Faber today. Was uber unwilling to go to work today. Why must I fucking work on a fucking Sunday!?!

The choice was to go to work or to go to work. Wasnt hard to make a decision amongst those 2 choices. So dragged my lazy ass down.
And it turned out to be a decent if not great day.

Hanging around and ushering people to the cabins was effortless. Dinner time was a cable car trip down to habour front's hawker before an hour of jalan jalan at vivo city, catching in the sights and the sounds.
On a normal Sunday, I would have been holed up at home or playing mahjong at someone's place. Its a refreshing change to walk ard aimlessly for an hour. hahaha!

Went back up to Mt Faber in the cable car. Chatted with the guys there. Beoed the people having their sky dining in the cable car. Catching in the scenary. And poof! 11+. Time to go home.
Can slp late tonite. Anyway work's in the afternoon tml. This feels almost leisurely!

Off's on this Wednesday... Woo!!

Mahjong!

2007-08-11T03:45:00.000+08:00

Have been playing loads of mahjong recently. Suddenly loads of mahjong khakis popped up and I have been busy ever since.

Mahjong sessions are fun. We can chat about mundane everyday stuff, can joke... And of course, the winning of money. =P
Okok... Not always winning. But so far, it isn't so bad for me. Hope it stays this way. hahahaha

Gamed 13 uniques today. Damn high. It feels so much better than the normal max fan gaming, even though you get the same amount of $$. If you get what i mean, you get what i mean. If nt... I'm still happy! =P

Expectations and Reality Part 2

2007-07-15T15:06:00.000+08:00

I was discussing with a friend abt our future jobs. He was lamenting that air force didnt offer him a place up unti now.

R says: u sEe my nick

R says: until air force call mi for interview

R says: i wun take down

Me says: then i tink ur nick whole life no need change nick liao

R says: ...............

Hols

2007-07-03T21:39:00.000+08:00

Its great to go on hols. It feels great to wander around aimlessly in shopping centres, stopping occasionally for some nice chocolatey cake, have a cold cup of coffee...

Yes... I'm back from KL cum Genting trip. Even took a 21 seater back. Big leg space, a personal tv to boot, with loads of movies to choose from. All at the price of 50RM. Dirt cheap i say.

A major grouse... Got this friggin ulcer at the tip of my tongue. And it sucks. The tongue always touches the teeth and the soft flesh underneath. Which means, my ulcer is in the constant state of contact with some surface.

Usually, contact is painless and unfeeling. But this knnbccb ulcer is making my life living hell. Or helling live, whichever sounds worse.

Fuck ulcers!!

Parents

2007-06-26T16:12:00.000+08:00

Have been in the army for more than a month. Still didnt receive any job interviews. The only ones who called are the stupid insurance people. The other idiot company called offering peanuts as pay.

Everyday is the same routine. Wake up damn early, go to work.. Come home, take dinner, send a couple of resumes, play some games and sleep. Monotonous life. Something i believe will continue for pretty much the rest of my mundane life.

Send resume, at computer. Play games, at computer. Msn, at computer. Watch shows, at computer. Pretty much sitting in front of the damn machine when i get home. Blogging now also at computer... >.<

The lack of interview opportunities has led my parents to conclude that i've been playing instead of sending my resumes and finding for jobs. Truth be told, i have been doing the resume sending dutifully. And i dont see the need to inform them of all that i'm doing, since there arent any results in the first place.
And now they are bloody nagging at me for playing and not getting my priority right. For Christ's sake, am i supposed to go and tell them: 'Dad, Mum, Today i sent 3 resumes to xxx company, yyy company, zzz company". "Yesterday i sent to aaa company, bbb company, ccc company..."

Processing takes time, and my uni life ain't no sterling performance. But cut me some slack. Don't come to me and say: "Get your priorities right" "Spend time thinking what you wanna do".
I study Engineering, so i'm gonna do an Engineering job. Don't tell me i'm expected to sit ard and mope all day, wondering what i wanna do in life, and the moment i on the frigging com, you conclude that i'm playing games.

If I'm not given the benefit of any doubt, and no faith whatsoever, there's really no room for further conversation...

Army and Sickness

2007-06-03T19:23:00.000+08:00

Back in the army for the last month or so. Almost completely disappeared from the face of this world.

Lost an entire fortune at Genting a couple of weeks back. Haven been able to recover from the damage yet. ahahhaha..

Now i'm fucking sick. Sore throat sucks. Its the kind that even swallowing saliva hurts. Fever sucks too.
But.............. MC rox! Tomorrow see doc! Woot/sigh?

New Pet!

2007-04-18T21:42:00.000+08:00

I got a new pet.

I'm proud to present to you... Chao Tar!!

adopt your own virtual pet!

Expectations vs Reality

2007-04-10T15:43:00.000+08:00

I was chatting with this guy in msn.

Guy: You think in your whole life you will have 10 gfs?
Me: No.. Sian.. Got 5 i damn happy liao.

Guy: 5 easily...
Me: How many have u had?

Guy: 2.
Me: ...

Guy: Why?
Me: You 25yrs only have 2.

Me: By the time you hit 5, you 60+ yrs old liao.
Guy: ...
Guy: But i wan 10...

The difference between expectations and reality is often harsh

Here Pussy Pussy Pussy...

2007-04-07T03:19:00.000+08:00

Almost had a fight in Zouk. Xia lan kia v heong. Sibei xia lan. But don't dare fight. Only thing he held in his paws was his hp to call the police while he stood safely behind the protection of the bouncers while burling abuse at us.
Wimp...
meow... meow... *swipe paw pathetically in the cold night air*

They had like more than 4 guys, while our numbers stood at 2.5. One of us was unwilling to fight. Haha.. For all the right reasons. The cell in the police station doesn't actually look v inviting...

But we could have won. They were small, had raisins for balls and rabbit sweet for dicks.
One even trembled while saying: 'I call the police if you don't say sorry arh."
Oh.. Comeon... You might as well call your mummy while you're at it. She can feed you breast milk when i'm done with you mummyboy...

Anyway, its a fight that ended without a fight. Shucks.
And I'm sitting here, blogging about the pussy, and spoiling for a fight...
Here pussy pussy pussy... Here's an ikan bilis for you to bite on while u swipe your paw at me with 2 girls holding you from getting at me... *meow

Odourless Durian

2007-04-01T12:03:00.000+08:00

I just saw the shocking news on paper. They came up with this atrocious breakthrough of having an odourless durian.

Some of those interviewed didn't believe and said durians MUST have a smell. Another durian seller in Malaysia concluded that such a durian would be a flop in his country. And i totally agree.

Its an atrocity. Its like having satay with no chao tar smell. Its like having char siew with no sweet smell. Its... WRONG... Eating a mutated durian like that probably has side effects.

Why dont they spend more time trying to figure how to make out shit from stinking, our farts from smelling? I'm sure those odours are much more repulsive than the cute, prickly and fragrant durian...

New Addition!

2007-03-14T02:58:00.000+08:00

Alright... I discovered i have another friend who blogs. Check it out here!

Lizards

2007-03-08T00:58:00.000+08:00

Was walking down to wash clothes when i saw a lizard. A big FAT lizard, resting happily against a wall.

Nothing special? Think again. If the fucking lizard is fat and happy. It means it ain't eating no mosquitos in the near few hours. And that's bad news. This fucking place is fucking infested with fucking mosquitos.

One puny and oversaturated lizard is no help against the legions of mosquitos they have here. Its a full blown war here i tell you. Legions of mosquitos vs 1 puny lizard.
Humans 0, Mosquitos 1

Of course i'm doing my part. Mosquitos have been feeding off me as if they are in the buffet, and i'm the spread. Fuck.

An overzealous and greedy mosquito has it tough too. He apparently sucked too much blood from me that he couldn't fly really fast. I whacked it in midair and it fell to the floor, only to be crushed by my unforgiving fingers of doom. My precious blood squirted out from the obese insect. Fuck once again. MY precious blood...

Lizards, start fucking and procreating... We need more than just ONE of your kind here...

Regrettably Overwhelmed

2007-03-06T21:54:00.000+08:00

Fuck.

I slacked for too long. The job in front of me is a long and ardous one. A mountain of stuff to do, and i'm scraping at it with a teaspoon. A PLASTIC teaspoon from MacDonalds. Yeah.. Fuck!

There's fyp report, assignments to hand in, lecture notes to read, projects due, presentations, and exams round the corner. Not to mention playing games, watching shows and animes, sleeping and slacking...

Brain is telling me to prioritize. Heart is telling me to go down playing. So i'm sitting here stoning while these 2 entities fight it out for control. Something tells me, heart will win the battle as i sit here figuring out...

Fuck.

Expectations or Unreasonable Demands?

2007-02-06T01:56:00.000+08:00

I was reading The Chronicles today. And i saw a couple of interesting article. There was this one that made me laughed out loud, i felt i had to share it here.

It is apparent that V Day is over glamorized, over romaticized and over hyped. Guys wanna take pretty chicks out on dates, Pretty chicks expect romantic and extravagant dinners and gifts. All is well and fine if you are working and rich, but poor studying blokes like me are not cut out for such high flying lifestyles.

But i digress... As so, The Chronicles went and did a survey of the blokes, and the chicks on campus. Lo and behold, i made a startling discovery.

Quoting this chick/hen ( i dont know cos i have never seen her, so its your pick): 'Taking a cab is the bare minimum... wants no less than an extavagant dinner at Equinox or cable-car dining... plus point if he has a car cos i need not lug a HUGE teddy bear and Bouquet of flowers...'
Just a cab? Just a car? Ask for a jaguar or something!
Equinox or cable-car dining? Ask for a trip to Paris just for dinner!
Just a Huge teddy bear and flowers? Ask for 999 roses!
Guess wat was the final sentence to her list of demands was? "She is currently UNATTACHED."
Now... I wonder why such a fantastic girls with such ideals would be unwanted, albeit, left of the shelf...

Most of the other girls surveyed has different expectations, but every single one demanded bouquets of flowers, gifts, fine dining, and 'bare minimum' cab, even though the guy isnt even her boyfriend.

Well, there are suckers and there are suckers.

If its for my girl, dining and flowers are normal requests... But stuff like fine dining and an abnormal amount of flowers are wrong. As wrong as you licking on the underwear you just peed on.
Unless i'm Bill Gates kind of rich... Haha...

It Made My Day

2007-01-31T02:40:00.000+08:00

This just made my day. Hyori ROCKS!!
Amazing bod, fantastic dance moves, alluring features... How much better can it get?

And admit it guys.. How many of you were actually paying attention to wat she's singing? HAHA

Hyoree - Shall we dance MV
Uploaded by kimhye

Icecream

2007-01-30T23:23:00.000+08:00

I just took a test.

And guess what. Yours truly here is the daddy of cool. Here are the results:

COOKIE DOUGH!
You scored 74% SWEET, 74% CHUNKY, and 40% UNIQUE!

Vanilla ice cream with gobs of chocolate chip cookie dough.
You're an oldie, but goodie...the now-classic chocolate chip cookie dough.
It's sweet, but not overwhelmingly so, and has just the right amount of chunks.
You make a good friend and your wild streak shows itself every now and then...enough to make things interesting. Y
ou prefer to stick with what you know, but sometimes can't help getting a little crazy.

My test tracked 3 variables. How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 99% on SWEET
You scored higher than 99% on CHUNKY
You scored higher than 99% on UNIQUE Now... Since i'm the top 1 percentile of my level...

Being all cool and nice at the same times, as well as being uniquely ME, its time for the queue to form to date me out! Haha...

Bad Day

2007-01-17T01:35:00.000+08:00

Today is a fucked up day. A sonafabitch stole my shirt. My fav one at that... With a cute Byakuya cartoon. Sg dun have that kind.

To the fucker who took the shirt. May you choke on e food u eat, kena knock by car when on the road, kena struck by lightning on the streets, fall down the stairs you climb, kena bird shit under the tree, and just fucking die you sonfabitch!!

I dont fucking understand... Its just a shirt. Cannot just go get one urself? CCB. You got the hands to steal it, you got the strength to get the money to buy one. Fucking return me the fucking shirt you fucker... You can keep the damn hanger.. But i want the shirt.

Today is a fucked up day. The world is full of fucked up people. Die assholes... DIE!

The Battle of The Peak Hour

2007-01-11T20:36:00.000+08:00

I was waiting for the beloved mrt just now, to get back to home sweet home. And guess wat... I met with the dreaded peak hour crowd.

There... In front of me, stood 84351039032 people, and only ONE door... And when the train came, everyone squeezed and shoved. So i did the most common sense thing. I stepped back. Soon after, another 803893457843 people came in front of me, and squeeze and shove they did. And i stepped back again...

After 3 trains gng by in this manner, i realised something is amiss. I had just wasted 15mins and the fucking crowd has not reduced. It is so wrong. So i did the next most common sense thing. I stared at every single fucker who tried to step in front of me. Lo and behold! I got into the next train easily as every single bugger felt my presence.

How do these peeps survive the pushing and shoving? I swore i saw one silly bugger get 'kiaped' by the doors. Stupid piece of shit...

Movie Galore

2006-12-26T16:55:00.000+08:00

In a mere few days, i went for 2 movies... Something i seldom do. Movies can be watched much cheaper somewhere else. Haha...

Curse of The Golden Flower

This show sucked so bad, i dunno how to start. Jay Chou cannot act for nuts. And the most memorable scene was the one with his trembling jaw. FYI, trembling jaw = angry, in this Jay Chou context. Other better actors would do things like frown, tigthen jaws. But definately not trembling jaws. Its for uncles suffering from a fit...

The storyline started with nothing and ended with nothing. Zhang Yimou managed to waste tonnes of cash creating rubbish for a movie and still remain in business for so long. There was only splendor in the large masses, the different colour armies, and the millions of pots of flowers. Oh... As well as the noisy fuckers who run around making mayhem every 2 hours. By the time the idiots finish walking thru the palace, 2 hrs would have past.. How accurate is tt for a clock if you are at the last destination?

As for the fighting, it was decent, but not magnificent. And pray tell me. Which army wo seeks victory would allow the enemy to push so many large tall metal walls through the entire courtyard before flailing ineffectually at the formation that took 1hr to set up in front of their eyes. I say... ATTACK them while they r pushing idiots! ATTACK!!

Now for the better part. There were boobs, and there still were boobs. Bouncing boobs on a horse, jiggling boobs while running. Zhang Yimou really milked the boobs factor till its dry. (Every pun intended)

Confessions of Pain

This is an excellent show. So good, i only have praise for it. Only a couple of minor irritances, otherwise, its great through and through.

The storyline is great. Its decently complex and intriguing up to the very last minute. But the ending and certain details could be guess. But that aside, this show portrays the complexities of humans. Its ugly, and its beauty. All as one. Conflicting and accentuating each other.

This show totally lifted my day. Prior to it, i was really pissed. And suddenly, after it, i felt great. Watch it guys... Watch it!

A World of Assholes

2006-12-04T00:20:00.000+08:00

This whole world is filled with idiots. Fucking filled with idiots, i'm telling you.

Usually i can look past the stupidity of certain actions, i can forgive the bastardity of some actions. But today is the limit. In a sheer matter of hours, i witnessed countless of idiotic acts, of bastards being assholes. And here i'm telling you idiots and assholes: Fuck you.

I don't understand why people do stupid things even after being told countless of times not to do the same fucking stupid thing. I don't understand why some people can be bastards, even to friends.

Don't they realise that admin stuffs need time? A simple I'm busy doesn't mean u can procrastinate till the last fucking minute. Things need to get planned, get booked. If you are really that fucking busy, don't fucking watch tv, go out for movies. You should be busy all the fucking time you busy fucker. Then don't come and say you want this, you want that, when you fucking not contributing to anything to what you want.

Then go live your selfish fucking busy life. Fuck off.

Riding On A High

2006-11-28T13:56:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is the last paper! FINALLY!!

The month long agony has came to an end. Short term relief is round the corner, but the damn fyp is gng to burn most of my dec hols. Knn..

Have been struggling throughout the last month. Studying has never been my forte. Concentrating is a chore. I used to think that its normal. But i see hundred of people mugging day and night. Makes me wonder if i'm the abnormal one.

But hell yeah. I'm happy right now...

Holed Up

2006-11-25T00:35:00.000+08:00

This is the 2nd week since i've holed myself up in the hall. Maggi mee overdose brings about a whole new meaning. Bread has became the next hardest thing to stomach.

1 more week to freedom! Woohoo!

Here's a crappy joke to brighten up your otherwise dull day folks.

Three Bad-Ass Mice

Three mice are sitting in a bar. The first one exclaims, "I am one bad-ass mouse! In my hood, we have huge mousetraps. I take the damn cheese out of the traps and move the bar up and down while I eat."

The second one chimes in with, "Oh yeah. Well, I'm a bad-ass mouse too. In fact, I'm such a bad-ass mouse, that in my hood, I mix rat poison with my milk and chug it down every night before I go to bed."

The third gets up and starts to leave. The other two mice both yell out, "Hey chicken, where do you think you're going?"

The third one replies, "Going home to fuck the cat."

Who pawns who now? HAHA!

Check It Out!

2006-11-24T01:18:00.000+08:00

Ok! There's this new communal blog where we jointly blog by me and the rest of the boys. You peeps must go take a look. Its COOL!

3/4 of exams through now. Faring decently in my battle. Now getting pawned, but not pawning that well either. Either way, 3 more papers to 1 mth of freedom! Woo!!

Happiness

2006-11-14T20:56:00.000+08:00

How do we gauge happiness?

I have a decently happy family. There's not much of a financial problem, everyone is doing fine, and healthy.

I have a couple of brudders and good friends. I'm not alone.

I'm in a local university pursuing a degree/honours. Not fantastic grades, but not failing that bad either. A decent future awaits.

There's money in my wallet, there's a laptop to play games and music.

But i'm not happy.

And i don't know how to be happy.

Something is wrong. Fucking wrong. And i fucking cannot put my fucking finger on the fucking problem.

Time... Stop!

2006-11-14T00:42:00.000+08:00

Exams coming... And i'm nowhere near reading thru the notes for the FIRST time, much less revision. I'm soooooo fucked.

Having a whole bunch of shows in my com isn't helping much either. A mouse click here, a msn chat there, 40mins-1.5hrs on a show. Wala! My day is gone...

Even as i type now, there's this small little fry trying to fly into my nose to spoil my already spoilt day. KNN!!

I NEED TIME!!! I need the power to stop time... Time... STOP!!

Your son? My son!

2006-11-06T22:32:00.000+08:00

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room.Those who remained talked about their kids.

The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday."

The second guy said, "Darn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, and then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday."

The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion."

The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?" One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. What about your son?"

The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub." The three friends said: "What a shame... what a disappointment." The fourth man replied: "No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done too badly either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends."

Beautiful World

2006-11-05T01:55:00.000+08:00

This world is so fucking beautiful.

Just the other day, i saw this cute cockroach doing situps. Amazing, it did like 50 reps in 1 min. Well done. This cockroach as a future. A bright one. Only if it manages to flip itself back up before someone sees it and steps on its atheletic body.

Was swimming today. The fucking pool is so crowded with non swimmers. They stand there soaking in e water with their belly protruding so far out, they can't see their toes. How the fuck can someone get so fat? And why are they warming the already warm water?

Then some of the disabled people would start failing at the water, on the pretext of swimming. Thrashing and flailing the arms and legs in water is not called swimming if you can only move an inch in 1 min. Its called drowning. Such fools should start in the baby pool where its shallower.

There was this disabled guy in the pool that especially caught my attention. He would flap his arms, then kick a fountain of water up, pause, kick a fountain of water, pause. I concluded he had only one leg. When he climbed out of the water, to my surprise, he had two legs. Makes me wonder why only 1 leg is kicking... Anyway, he should keep his legs low... Splashing water would only slow him down. Fool...

So... In summary... Fat uncle and aunties should stay at their condos and swim. They should keep their noisy wailing kids with them. Non swimmers should stay in e kids pool and e shallower one meant for noobs. And i have the whole big one for myself!!

THE Test

2006-10-23T01:16:00.000+08:00

Since i saw so many people takig this test, i figured it wouldnt hurt if i took it too. And shucks... got the lousiest title there is...

Joe Normal

17 % Nerd, 13% Geek, 17% Dork

For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored less than half in all three, earning you the title of: Joe Normal.

This is not to say that you don't have some Nerd, Geek or Dork inside of you--we all do, and you can see the percentages you have right above. This is just to say that none of those qualities stand out so much as to define you. Sure, you enjoy an episode of Star Trek now and again, and yeah, you kinda enjoyed a few classes back in the day. And, once in a while, you stumble while walking down the street even though there was nothing there to cause you to trip. But, for the most part, you look and act fairly typically, and aren't much of an outcast.

I'd say there's a fair chance someone asked you to take this test. In any event, fairly normal.

NORMAL MEH! I TOT I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE BRILLIANT!?! Where's the justice in this??

Oktoberfest and Kakura King... KON!!

2006-10-19T23:57:00.000+08:00

In celebration of Oktoberfest, i bought a box of 4 Erdingers along with 2 cups. And i bought Kon too. Its now sitting happily in my hostel, guarding my bed. haha...

There... Kon and my Oktoberfest collection. When shall i start drinking? Mmmmm.... ^^

Drowning, Drowned

2006-10-04T11:49:00.000+08:00

2 quizzes 1 presentation this week. Should have fuckign studied last week. But no, the inner devil has prevailed and i slacked all through the previous week.

Now i'm fucked. Presentation later, quiz tomorrow and friday. Quiz not studied, presentation clueless. How damn is that?

Woke up this morning, lay on the bed and refused to move. This is bad. As bad as the raising oil prices. Seriously, something is fucking wrong with me. In the face of impending doom, how can i stay so calm and detached? Like as if it has nothing to do with me.

Wonder when is the next time i'm ever going to seriously feel for something or someone... School. Fucking. Sucks. FUCK

Busy, Engrossed, Out Of Touch...

2006-09-28T23:53:00.000+08:00

I haven't been posting here for a very long time. Don't think i will too often. Cos life has been hectic, and not all that fun. Furthermore, i'm feeling kinda stifled from writing here...

The fact that i have friends reading the junk i'm writing was intially fun lar. Then at certain times, i wanted to post something. Scolding somebody i know for some stupid idiotic act, or for something tt he/she has done to piss me off. But being the model confucian/chinese guy, i have to practice the virtues taught from young rite? I can't lash out at that sonafabitch/bitch. I must be modest, must be humble, and keep my boiling blood, along with my 10000000curses inside me... Amen...

So there... I'm feeling stifled. And so, all that is going to be written here from now on will be rubbish and only rubbish. The real secrets and hidden thoughts will be somewhere else.. Somemore u dudes will never find out. =X

And because of this new place taking up my attention and time, the effort here will hit a bare minimum. So if you don't like what i'm writing, you can jolly well don't come back. Haha!

I HATE CROWDS

2006-08-08T01:35:00.000+08:00

Lo and behold. 1st day of school. And it fucking sucked.

There are thousands of people. And they are taking up every nook and cranny of the whole fucking school. The damn library is crowded and the canteens are filled to the brim, with no end of the crowd in sight. Normally, its nothing much, but these assholes are taking up my space, my seat in the canteen, my food. Until i had to run along to miserable NIE and eat shitty fried rice. And the fried rice sucked.

There were loads of booths, pointless things for idiotic people to gather and talk cock. Who the fuck needs such activities? These sonafabitches are just trying to make dating and flirting into a legalised activity in the name of the school. And yeah. The school is fucked too. With its limited space, its overstretching its capabilities to house such a huge amount of students lor. KNN

Watched Tokyo Drift. Decent show, nice cars, nice action. The drifting was cool, but a little too far fetched. Even the cars arent as cool as that of 2 Fast 2 Furious. And supper wasn't all that fantastic too. Everything's fucked.

And yeah. Today is fucked up. Really fucked up...

Last Week Left

2006-07-25T19:48:00.000+08:00

1 more week more in HK before i come back to Singapore. And there's conflicting feelings. So much so that i had to come write about it, after almost completely stopping blogging.

I made friends. I realised there are bastards and there are bastards. I see bitches who sleeps with angmohs, getting felt up. I see those fat girls being ignored by handsome and ugly alike. And i had my fun. And i still had my fun. I wish it could stay this way longer... More's the pity. Beautiful things never last. It never will.

Saying so, it doesn't mean i don't like sg. Of course i have my buddies in sg, buddies who go drinking, who chat, play games, who go out and have fun, who go out clubbing together and there is my dog.

Guess what... This sucks cos it feels like i'm a girl and getting all weepy about the coming sad goodbyes and whatnot. Fuck.

Enjoying Life!

2006-07-23T12:45:00.000+08:00

Time for some updates i guess. Life has been good. Courtesy of Macau, i have been living fairly like a king. Haha...

The food in the school is decent at best. There's loads of meat, and i ain't complaining. But there is like ZILCH for fruits, and i'm feeling deprived. And there isn't any fruit stalls that sells chilled cut fruits. I see a business opportunity here guys. Who's game to invest in my fruit stall in HK? I might even launch an IPO when my store gains widespread popularity. lol

But its swealthering hot here, but it beats raining lar. A lesser of 2 evils: sweating like a pig/getting drenched. I say... Both sucks! Thank god for air cons. Amithabha.

The clubbing here is damn fucking ex, but the chicks are good and in constant supply. Too bad my canto buang. If not cfm can chat them up. Heh.
But drinks bought off the shelf from convenience stores are cheap DAO. A can of heineken is like 1sgd i think... Even alcohol like chivas is abt 70sgd nia.

And glorious glorious shopping. Seriously, i dont really shop much. The shopping i did here is more than i ever did in my entire 24yrs on earth.

So... Life;'s generally good here. So much better than i seriously don't quite wanna go back sg liao. Haha... Never in my life have i seen a sunrise, but over here, i've seen like 3 and it really great, except tt e company a little wrong. Lol...

Here comes the fucked up news. My fucking lappy died on me once again. KNN...

Fuckers

2006-06-24T02:47:00.000+08:00

This world is filled with the abovementioned people. So much so that it never fails to irk me at how ugly it has become.

I see Singaporeans acting angmoh, become condescending towards their own fellow people, trying to speak in a slang that sounds so fake, i cringe. In fact, i quite enjoy staying in the little dot i call Singapore. And i'm proud of my lousy english.

And my fuse is burning short, esp when i realise i have a couple of sg guys who have absolutely ZERO integrity. Too tired to write the whole grandmother story, too far to show u the assholes. Anyway im the good guy, so those i dislike are the bad ones.

But shopping is damn good. Here the stuff cheap DAO. And the bluff stuff looks like the real thing. Tag Heur, Rolex watches at extremely good quality gng at 70sgd nia.

Even the food is damn good. But the portions a little too huge, even for me. And i'm a monster!

I'm Leaving On A Jet Plane

2006-06-15T20:53:00.000+08:00

All my bags are packed, i'm ready to go.
I'm standing here, yadda yadda yadda. Baby i'm so yadda yadda yadda.
I'm leaving on a jet plane! Don't know when i'll be back again!

Finally the day has come for me to leave this god forasaken place and presumably head for promise land. The land of riches and unparalled chicks. Hong Kong!
I must eat all the roast pigeons, char shao, har kao!

Acherly, its not exciting lar. In fact, it feels like a chore rite now. Happiness factor 1/10 that kind. I hate socialising, especially from scratch with strangers. Chicks besides the point. They are worth the effort.

And today's astro exams damn easy. Can so easy one meh. No need study also can answer. And i suspect got business kids struggle. Cause they not used to xiong papers? Haha!
Somemore i wasted the whole night studying for it. Total waste of time!

Say say say say say! I think i go sleep liao. OKAY!

Many Things

2006-06-12T11:36:00.000+08:00

Its getting increasingly troublesome to write. Especially when not all feelings and thoughts can be written. Its self censorship to a certain extent, but i guess its for the greater good...

Dbl O

Drinking was good. Dancing was fun. Dean had a chick to dance with. The rest of us poor dudes had to wander around aimlessly. Haha.

Dbl O is cool cause of the fucking cheap drinks. And enough alcohol always improves a relatively boring day to something much better. But having chicks would of course be better. But they are scarce commodities when the ratio there is 3:1.

But at least Dean had a chick to dance with all night. Makes people envious. Haha...

Genting

Fucking lost every single fucking cent there. But i really sway while there lar. I stand where, dealer wang until where. Got like tt one meh.

At a point of time, the table i was looking at from a winning crowd with 6 people seating became pitifully desolate with only 2 poor dudes left. Chi ru!

The food in Genting also sucks. Not nice and so expensive. Sian dao arh.

Now

Flying in a couple of days. I really should finish the packing and start a little studying for astro...

Seemingly Fun

2006-06-01T21:46:00.000+08:00

Hand still aching. Sian dao arh.

Yesterday had Spageddies for dinner. Hao chi! But had to wait v v v long. I dun like waiting so long.

I think i had crayfish spagehetti... Or was it lobster... Well. I dunno, but it tasted good, and cost as much as a lobster lar. Haha!

The chicken spagehetti tasted normal. Lucky its 1 for 1. If not i spotted no chance go there makan. Will pok one. But what the heck. I pok anyway. -.-''

Tomorrow going genting liao. Must win 2 big bags of cash back. Haha!

Pain Dao Arh!

2006-05-29T20:44:00.000+08:00

Today shoulder dislocate. Fucking pain. Until now also pain. ARGH!

Now like an injured puppy. Wanna lift my paw also move it gingerly. T.T

But still, its cool lar. Used to the pain liao. Lucky got a lot of people help me. If not mayb i si kiao kiao liao.

Thanks to yq who help me wipe sweat. Thanks to ros who drove, thanks to ric who pei me ard the damn hospital. Thanks to hua who contributed using eyepower. haha!

ARGH!

2006-05-27T01:36:00.000+08:00

Desktop chuiz. Troublesome dao arh...

Then someone showed me this power video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSHziqJWYcM
Go see that xia lan uncle. Unreasonable! ARGH! Imagine how much saliva he splattered on the poor goondo's face! -.-''

Somemore insult mother. This kind is asking for fight one. The nerd very polite sia. I suspect he scared. haha...

As always, polite to a polite person. Respect a person who respect you. Be an asshole to an asshole. Fair treatment!

Xmen was cool. Besides the fact that almost everyone died at the very ending, the CG's cool. The storyline's decent. The idea of having powers is cool. Unless ur power is to transform into a mouse, and only a mouse. Then it sucks....

Naggings

2006-05-15T16:23:00.000+08:00

Recently i keep getting nagged at. My mum, my dad, even total strangers. Wtf...

A week ago i got terribly sick rem? I was at this clinic and getting the medicine from the counter. My mum came over and started nagging at me in front of everyone, telling me to not drink cold water, drink more warm water, remember to eat medicine, finish the antibiotics, rest more, sleep early, etc etc...

And there i was, sick until cannot think straight liao, somemore gotta undergo such torment... Then i suddenly heard a sniggering at my side and turned to look. This young man, prolly a little older than me nia, giggling and smiling at me for all he was worth, giving me a i-totally-understand-your-pain look. Do all mums like to nag so much?

But i appreciate it. Better to have someone nagging at you, then losing tt precious someone...

I was at a polyclinic today. I woke up damn late, and arrived there at lunch time, so the closed the damn counter. Had to wait till 130 before the counter opens and everyone was queuing there.

This ah pek suddenly started talking to me...

AP: How come must queue
Me: Cos they go lunch. Open at 130
AP: Why cannot let us take number so that we can sit down?
Me: Dunno
AP: If those disabled how? V inconsiderate hor the system
Me: Er... Yeah...
AP: Shld let us take queue number ma...
Me: uh.... Yeah...
Brief silence...

AP: I come cos my shoulder hurt. Got car door knock on me.
Me: I see...
AP: Here see doc how much arh? 80 cents rite?
Me: O.o Er... think its 8 bucks (Take bus also not so cheap lor... comeon... 80 cents meh!)
AP: Wah! So expensive. Elect PAP liao also must pay so much. Should make it free ma. That why i say PAP no use. Medical care should be free one.
Me: Uh... 8 bucks consultation is decent lar...
AP: Zeng hu sibei bo por... Knn...

Medical care free meh? Seriously, that sounds communistic to me. Might as well food is rationed out... Based on needs and not on merits... Opposition also no chance make it free i suspect. Unless we wanna empty our government coffers just to give out free medical care. Sibsidized rates are cool liao...

AP: Go JB for treatment cheaper. There medicine cheap, everything cheap.
Me: Yeah... (hoping conversation can end....)
AP: There change car also good. Buy car from JB then drive in singapore...
Me: Can meh? Got regulation to stop tt one i tink
AP: No lar. Can one. Drive Malaysia car in singapore can one.
Me: long term?
AP: Yeah... Somemore repairs in malaysia cheap
Me: Orh...
AP: NB... They shld let us take number so that we can sit ma...
Me: Uh... Yeah...
AP: Somemore they make us pay so much
Brief silence again...

AP:Very long hor? They should let us take number then can sit down and blow aircon.
ME: Yeah.
AP: U got go JB before? There the car cheap...
*OMFG. Got so lor sor one anot. Like a broken recorder....
AP: My shoulder hurts tt why im here.
Me: I see...
AP: They should let us take the number lar. Queue like tt not correct.
CCB!!!!! HELP!!!!
130 finally arrives after a tormenting 30mins of repetitive conversation... Amitabha!

Your Future, Our Future

2006-05-08T02:09:00.000+08:00

Pap won by a 66.66% share of all valid votes, winning 82 out of 84 seats. They said its a strong mandate. Is it?

I see more people getting emotional over the opposition's rallies than at PAP's. Personally, i think having opposition is fine, but i feel PAP doing a decent job lar.

Everyone has been criticising them. But they do have their plus points lar. They gave most of us a roof over our heads. At least we don't have loads of kids begging in the streets, dying of hunger. We have billions of dollars in our national kitty, and we do get perks occassionally.

I mean... I rather not see fighting in parliament like those in Taiwan. Imagine Lor That Kheng giving a left hook to Li Hsin Lorn. Cannot lar, wanna become international laughing stock meh.

And the need to have OUR voices in parliament. Isn't PAP the selected voices? And they are trying to hear from us with those GRC and whatnot they created right? What's the difference between these and the other opposition parties who is also representing OUR voices? Not the same voice?

I confused. Politics is a headache to me.

Just now i saw my special semester namelist. Excited, i went to try to figure out who's in my group. To my delight, i saw 3 girl name hor. The i went to check out the pics. I was stunned. I pray tee gong can do something about this tragedy that is about to befall me... -.-''

Then i went to see Hua's group. He onyl got 1 gal nia. But she looks decent lar... Got potential. But hua say she looks like a hen. >.<

Subsequently, the conversation continued:
Me: ric's group like not bad. There's this Pauline girl, like got potential...
* me went to look for her pic
* shows hua
Hua: Eh... Why u send me guy's pic? Thought u say is Pauline?
Me: Gal pic arh... no wrong...
Hua: Guy pic leh. U send wrong.
Me: Thats Pauline. -.-''
Hua: Wah
Hua: WAH!

Hua is bad.... LOL

Damn Fucking Sick

2006-05-05T18:16:00.000+08:00

Since exams ended on tues, i didnt manage to play to my hearts content. Have been giving tuition like mad, squeezing at best a couple of games. This sucks. Especially when its the hols and i ain't enjoying it like i should.

It sucks even more when the last paper is a CONFIRMED FAILURE. And i'm fucking down with a major headache, sore throat, flu and an impending fever.

Fuck.

It isn't supposed to be like this. I'm supposed to be in the pink of health, playing till the wee hours of the morning, sleeping till was past afternoon. What happened to THE plan?? T.T

Next week intersem starts. I have already decided to skip the damn lessons the moment my project group is formed. Unless there's a chick in my group lar. Then i'll go lessons. Can sit beside chick. Can talk to chick. Must go liao. If... And only if lar.

Another bad news for the day is i've booked my plane tix to Hong Kong liao. Budden, the fucking tix is like $340. 60 bucks up from the original price of $280. Cause i booked it 3 days late.

Once again. Fuck.

This sucks. Why i so sway. Damn. I'm so full of grouses, i'm burping...

Slacking

2006-04-27T15:31:00.000+08:00

Had so much fun playing and watching shows.

There's this particularly ridiculous korean show called 綁架愛情100天. The only watchable thing in it was this particularly cute girl. Haha.

There was a point where the guy deserted the girl, and she keeps crying and remembering the happy past. In her crying, desolate state, she looked so protectable, so vulnerable. Makes me wanna go protect her from the harsh realities, from all the sadness. ^^

Then i snapped out of the day dream. Yes, in normal everyday lives got such flashbacks of happy memories, and there's overwhelming sadness, but there isn't the beauty and happy endings.

Fuck the media. They playing with your subconcious, making you believe in the happily-ever-after ending, allowing you to think that all this would also happen to you. They hype all the lovey dovey shit, making the lesser of you humans into crying wimps. Hahaha

The ending for the damn show lagi best. The guy brings the chick to this dark place, the background suddenly lights up to show a palace like surroundings. And when they kiss, fucking got fireworks in the sky. WTF!!

Last One!

2006-04-26T13:27:00.000+08:00

3 weeks of hell, and finally the final paper awaits! Woohoo!

Today's paper is the most doable among all the 5 papers i've taken. So doable until i cannot stop smiling. Haha...

Finally got one paper i confident can pass one. The those people come out, start looking very sad and shaking their heads like as if the blank the entire paper. Come out say: die die... Chui chui...

Fuck you assholes. If ninpeh come out smiling and saying can pass, noone allowed to say they fail or they die hor!

I must thank Zhongmin and hua for explaining and sharing that 'zhen jing'. Without it, i think i goner liao. Yeah!

Then again, studying is torturous, but i must say it beats working, anytime. Even during exams.

How many hours a day do you have to work? Normally about 8hrs, considering a 9-5 job. But we know 9-5 job is a lie to con the naive. Where got work 9-5 one... i suspect its 830-630 that kind lor.

Then how many hours do you study a day? Strictly speaking, even during exams i dont think i got spend 8 hours lor. Why?

Daily process: Wake at 11. Bathe, lie in bed, lunch... Before you know it, its 2. Study a little, then start chatting on msn, playing a little dota, then its already 7.
So far. I suspect about 3 hours of study clocked. MAX.
Then we do a dinner and after dinner slacking. 8-9 study, then watch tv at 9-10. Start dota and chatting until 12, before studying for another 2 hours before slping. Xiong!!

Study time: 6-8hrs

How to lose? Hahaha....

2 Down, Loads More To Go!

2006-04-18T20:35:00.000+08:00

Finally finished 2 papers, 4 more to tackle. But the feeling is good. Studying isn't so bad afterall, it just plain sucks...

Just submitted the form to go HongKong for this intersem. Hope it goes through... Haha. But i applied alone, means i'll be all alone. Which is a good thing. There isn't much to look forward to in holidays anyway.

I saw some pics somewhere on the internet today. And it dawned upon me that i'm blessed. Heaven has been good to me.

Through a wierd twist of fate, i didn't get what i initially wanted. Only to find out that what i wanted wasn't as good as i thought it to be! What luck!

Fuck, i'm not materialistic or what lar. But some things just cannot compromise one. Hmm... Baffled? Too bad...

On to something else... Just now hua say he wanna box me. Sibei heong. Then he started waving his fists and swinging his leg like a gorrila. Kinda scary...

Now he sleep liao. Think he swing and wave till tired. Haha...

Recently think exam very stressful and tiring. I everyday see e notes, very tired. Very fast eyes close. Can sleep like 15hours a day lor.

Last night i cannot sleep, keep tossing and turning. I took out the damn notes, i fell soundly asleep in 5mins. -.-''
Got like that one anot!!!

无尽的爱

2006-04-14T12:40:00.000+08:00

Finally got my lappy back. And i finally started playing like mad. Haha... No lappy, sleep a lot. The moment eyes land on the notes, eyelids closes. This is chi ru.

This weekend i confine myself. Hope it works out fine...

Watched The Myth? A show long ago. Not fantastic, not even close to great. But i like the fantasy idea. And i like the song too..

解开我最神秘的等待
星星坠落风在吹动
终于再将你拥入怀中
两颗心颤抖

相信我不变的真心
千年等待有我承诺
无论经过多少的寒冬
我决不放手

(韩)

每一夜被心痛穿越
思念永没有终点
早习惯了孤独像随
我微笑面对

相信我我选择等待
再多苦痛也不闪躲
只有你的温柔能解救
无边的冷漠

(韩)

让爱成为你我心中
那永远盛开的花
穿越时空绝不低头
永不放弃的梦

让爱成为你我心中
那永远盛开的花

唯有真爱追随你我
穿越无尽时空

我们连"爱你"这句话都无法讲

爱是心中唯一不变美丽的神话

Ok ok.... The lyrics not completely correct. Some of the spelling is chui one. But i copy and paste lar, lazy to edit. Haha

1 Week to DOOMSDAY

2006-04-06T21:10:00.000+08:00

This is bad. After next week, is exams liao. I set a goal to study 4 hours a day. I only managed 40mins. Haiz... This sucks...

Now i'm way behind schedule, and the nagging discomfort in my mind telling me something is wrong has escalated to a full scale pain. SHIT!

So something had to be done. I had to destress. So i went to watch Ice Age 2. Muhahaha! And i destressed even before i started studying for it. Heh!

This Ice Age was funnier last time. This time the plot more lame. But still funny nonetheless. Guess which character i like best?

Yes... Its this cute thing. I have no idea what you call it, but this idiot's determination to get the acorn/walnut called for respect.

Lets do a recap of how determined he is. started out getting his tongue stuck in ice, followed by getting a mouth full of ice. Skidded through ice, fell through cliffs, climbing steep walls.

The best was the one where he used a twig and used it as a pole to vault over to the walnut. He failed by a hairline, and tumbled to his doom. Amazing how strong these creatures are. Fall so far still never die. Haha! Funny!

Where's my combo drive!

2006-04-04T19:54:00.000+08:00

HP said 30th my combo drive come. But they lie. Now already 4/4/06 liao. My combo drive not in sight. Not even a damn phone call. Sian...

No cd rom very sad. Cannot install stuff, cannot watch movie. Wanna burn stuff also struggling. Sian max. Now my lappy dont even have microsoft words. Hai...

Think HP service not bad. But their efficiency is putting me off. 4 days after promised date leh. At least gimme a call lar. KNN!

And exams coming. I haben started on anything yet. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. All i wanna do is relax, and pa game. I spotted i got no ambitions, no dreams... Hmm.. Got dreams lar, also got ambition. But i is lazy. Refuse to work towards what i want. Chi ru!

Just now got presentation. I garbra. Forgot my lines. Then i stand there and grin stupidly at the tutor. This time hong gan. Heh. The tutor stare at me for a full minute. I stare back that kind. At least it felt like a full minute to me lar.

Sua. Anyway over liao. Paiseh i chui the team. But really i got read and try to rem lor. Dunno why i stunned. Think cos no audience. Haha!

Site Feed?

2006-04-03T00:03:00.000+08:00

Is this a site feed? http://xia-la.blogspot.com/atom.xml

I absolutely lazy to read... Browse thru then got tired, so anyhow do...

About the epic battle for supremacy that happened last saturday, get the full details on http://donaq.blogspot.com. It was close, but alas, victory cannot be shared!

Die liao... Exams coming!!!

Funfilled = Fulfilling?

2006-04-02T14:37:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was funfilled. Makaned and walked around chinatown and city hall. Crowded place with loads of small kids and youngsters.

Near Esplanade, there's this place where those cyclist, skaters, dancers gather and show off. Sitting there, waiting for the photos to be taken, i had a short time to do some reflection. Maybe hua's right. My lifestyle's too sedentary. I cannot imagine myself picking up such kind of activities. Haha.. Ages is not an excuse. I see ah peks more active then yours truly.

Then comes the age old misery. Hmm... Not exactly a misery. I deem it peer pressure. Why the fuck is there so many couples?? They can do their lovey dovey at home lar. But kissing and hugging in front of me meh. Need to rub this kind of salt one anot. Hahaha...

Think again, maybe there are not THAT much couples and lovebirds lar. Just that since they are together, going out takes on a whole new meaning. Those single and lonely probably holed themselves up at home.

Photos done, self-imposed duty relieved, i went for a whole night of dota with the guys. Was damn late. But didnt miss much cos they only managed to squeeze 1 match ahead of me. Haha...

Won 3 consecutive matches, but the teams relatively imba la. Those who know, knows. Those who dont will never understand. Haha...But still, i got no complaints. Afterall i didnt lose. Hee...

The final game was close though. So close till i thought we had lost it. How we won? Ask the 8 guys who participated in the final epic battle for supremacy. LOL

The painted snoopy house was finally ready for collection. The lacquering was a little ameteurish. But still the house looked good. Took a couple of pics of the masterpiece, but my cdrom not repaired yet, cannot install program, cannot transfer the pics to get uploaded. Chi ru... Think i'll upload it later ba...

Today sunday liao. Tomorrow monday, another week of struggle. Somemore now exams coming. This is really fucked. I hate cramming, i hate studying hard. I hate exams. And worse, there's no light at the end of the damn tunnel. When the studying is through, working for the remaining of your life kicks in and you become a slave. A slave to money, a slave to fate...

Unless... Unless i strike toto....

Kiss Goodbye?

2006-03-29T20:22:00.000+08:00

Just now in school got this bunch of people catching students to do survey. And i kena caught, along wif hua and ric. I thought was some small quick survey. End up wasted like 15mins of my time answering questions...

Some silly but damn long survey about my ideas of er... relationship/dating/marriage/opportunities to date. Yeah.. Got so many topics, so confirm damn long. And i was laughing throughout the whole survey, cos i know hua and ric answers will prolly be similiar to mine.

But i must say i'm not active in activities organised by hall, school and everything else. Joined nothing, did nothing for the past few years.

A part of the survery went like this:
Guy: Why is it that you didnt take part in activities like FOC intially?
Me: No interest
Guy: What do you feel about it now?
Me: Regret!

Then that guy got this very stunned face. After that it went downhill. All the questions very piercing one, and they ask down to the very last detail...

For example:
Guy: Which activities have you taken part in?
*whips out a large paper with like 20+ activites organised by school and the likes.
Me: *scans thru the entire list and finding nothing...
Me: *looks closely at every single activity listed, thinking that i might have missed out something i joined but missed on the list...
Me: * staring harder at the list, praying hard something appears...
1min later.....
Me: Er... I joined NONE.
Guy: *eye open wide wide

I is chi ru. Sian... -.-''

Recently i rediscovered that Wang Li Hong is very power. Last time i know he power liao. But then i think i forgot, so i rediscovered lor.

Kiss Goodbye is a power song. In his 盖世英雄 album one:

Lyrics:
Baby不要再哭泣
这一幕多么熟悉
紧握着你的手彼此都舍不得分离
每一次想开口但不如保持安静
给我一分钟专心
好好欣赏你的美

幸福搭配悲伤
痛是在我心交叉
挫折的眼泪不能测试爱的重量
付出的爱收不回
还欠你的我不能给
别把我心也带走去跟随

每一次和你分开
深深的被你打败
每一次放弃你的温柔痛苦难以释怀
每一次和你分开
每一次kiss you Goodbye
爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白

幸福搭配悲伤
痛是在我心交叉
挫折的眼泪不能测试爱的重量
付出的爱收不回
但欠你的我不能给
我才明白爱最真实的滋味

每一次和你分开
深深的被你打败
每一次放弃你的温柔痛苦难以释怀
每一次和你分开
每一次kiss you Goodbye
爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白

我终于明白每一次和你分开
深深的被你打败
每一次放弃你的温柔痛苦难以释怀
每一次和你分开
每一次kiss you Goodbye
爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白

Busy Busy Happy Bee

2006-03-27T18:44:00.000+08:00

Weekends are forever busy. At least for now. Haha. Celebrated Alex's birthday at Oriental PartyWorld. Normal singing fare lar. The amazing part was got people can run off without paying the bill. Lucky e bill not i ta one. Me poor guy...

Lagi funny is we sing finish last song liao still dun wan to leave. Sit there play 'jit ba ban' thru Gerald's hp. Somemore can sing along with it. Heh!

Yesterday even more goot lat. Go bugis see kids play with water. Then wandered to esplanade to see those hip hop and bicycle stunt gang at the very wide open space. That space very hidden one. Noobs never heard of it before. So u dunno, u noob! Haha!

But then lucked out. No biker gang, no hip hop gang. Only got tamil gang. They playing tamil songs, dance tamil dance. I see a while sian liao. Turned around, see a group of bangalah ogoling at them. Very heong... They like very tiko like that. I half expected them to dance another tamil dance and join the group of girls. Heh...

Then at suntec, spotted this place got sell clay figurine one. You buy the figurine, then can paint it on the spot. Very steady. I small the time always paint this kind of figurine. But dunno why, it never got popular. Kids nowawdays very sad one. Only know PSP, Xbox. Simpler pleasures of life is lost on them. What happened to the gorli matches in sand, what happened to Pepsi Cola 1 2 3!!!

The figurine i painted is this snoopy figurine. Got very limited paint, so must use carefully. I started out with the rooftop. So confirm is red one ma.

Then the body of the house is brown one rite? So i told a certain someone to mix the brown colour out. First we mix red with yellow to form orange. Then you add a tinge of black to make it light brown. Then arh... This someone hor... Put one big lump of black into the orange and started mixing furiously. Guess what... The orange became 'da bian' colour. -.-''
Got so lousy at mixing colour one anot?? Haha...

End up, no more red. Cannot mix any more brown. Somemore make me not enuf red to paint finish the roof, must dilute the remaining red... Then arh, that certain someone said paint e body light blue... Paint finish liao, left only green colour. So bobian, all the doors hafta paint green.

I see the whole paintwork when its done. Still not so bad lar. Afterall i paint one leh. Budden. Some parts quite chui. But i know not i do one. So i relieved. HAHA!

Then got these cute kids see us paint see until very fascinated. Stand very close to observe the great masters at work. Then a couple of them started this conversation

Cute kid 1: Wa.. They paint very nice hor.
Cute kid 2: Yeah, very very nice.

Cute kid 1, cute kid 2, *eyes shine wide in admiration.

Woohoo... I power! Erm.. I mean. WE power! Haha... I LOVE kids!

Fun Turned Sour

2006-03-23T15:46:00.000+08:00

This week sucked as usual. Got reports due, lots of notes and tutorials left undone, quiz and got the damn 3011 project.

Notes and tutorials nv read and do is normal lar, i always never do one. But knn... The report i wanna do but cannot. Gotta go library. The cb HP tell me say the combo drive earliest is 30th then can get. Not 20th. now my lappy got nothing except wc3. How the hell can i do the damn report?
The tomorrow must hand in. Sibei chui....

Then later got the damn sus tech quiz. Lucky this time not a lot to read. Hopefully can pass. Lucky Hua very zai one, depend on him le. Hahaha.

Worse is 3011 project. How the hell they expect me to do the damn bridge? So many things to calculate, so many pictures to draw. Draw using bare hands i chui, draw using CAD i also chui. Either way also die. Sian max.

Then my angmoh tutor ask for a lot. I hear liao very scared. Worse, i see many people successfully doing it up. Then i look at my project, in small small pieces... Haven draw up a single piece of shit. Haven even started on hydraulics. Yesterday then i just started writing the damn intro. But write halfway, discover i writing rubbish...
Fuck la. I don't think i'm stupid one leh. How come still lose to others?

So many issues, no solutions. Actually got lar. That solution very obvious one. But i refusing to take that solution. Haha... If i stop playing, stop wasting my time doing nothing. Convert all this time to studying and completing the stuffs, easily can one lar. But its a very 'ku' solution. I don't like!

Last night got nightmare. I wake up believing it actually happened. Heong... I dreamt that i was playing games at home. Then one of my friends called me asking how i did for the exams. I was like "Huh, results out liao arh". So i went to check lor. Then i saw that i failed 3 subjects. 3011, 3001 and 3002.

Fail 3 subjects means i auto study 1 more sem in NTU liao. Then i felt a tinge of regret and sadness. Maybe, just maybe i should have worked harder. Why is it that i'm less motivated than others?

Paintball!!!

2006-03-20T18:33:00.000+08:00

Finally got the paintball pics! Before the entire 'wargames' started, we took a 'family photo'. After this photos, friends became enemies and no mercy was spared in killing each other! Haha!

Its was Team CoC, Team Horsey and Team Mad. And I'm bigger than the biggest horsey. Heh!

Hereby, i shall show u a glimpse of my comrades and in arms. Richard, Hua, Melvin, Me. Horsey number 5 went missing right after the match. So you guys lucked out. Anyway i'm the biggest horsey and the man of the match lar. So why bother about anything else? Haha...

Big Horsey 'Ric' suffered a devastating neck shot, leaving him a big red lovebite. Power!

Here's Team CoC. They didnt put up much of a fight lar. But cannot blame them. Who wants to get shot? Its painful lor...

Here's Gerald, Toe, Hua and me. The game very shack. Hafta run a lot and do loads of evasive movement. See our sweat!

3SG Chee lead his team to victory, but by a mere scrap of luck cause we ran out of ammo. Haha. But then again, win is win, lose is lose. Congrats!

This paintball shit is fun! Injured, tired and sweating, but its still great! Who's game for paintball?

Fun-filled Weekend. Bang Bang Bang!

2006-03-19T22:37:00.000+08:00

This weekend's one of the funnest one for quite a long time liao. Had songs at Teo Heng on friday. Sound systems sucked, but for the price i'm paying, guess can't be too choosey huh. Haha..

Went for dinner and lan. Got smashed by the kids at e-games. Total humiliation that kind. Guess dota isn't exactly my forte either. Lol...

Went Dbl O with a couple of friends. Those retro guys really got it cultish. Got specific moves and actions for different songs at different times one.

This one wanna learn, gotta take forever that kind lo. Anyway, my dancing suck kinda big time. So cannot blame anyone lar. Haha...Lucky later on, RnB came on. This one i see Toe and a couple of other friends dance before. Mian qiang still can shake a little. HAHA!

Today best. Went to Orchid Country Club play paintball. ITS FUN! I spotted i kill a lot of people that kind. But Toe's team damn good. I admit their teamwork and marksmenship are superior lar. But not by a lot. Just enough to beat us by a hair's breadth!

Almost everyone injured lar. But its worth the while. I spotted i'm one of the least injured ones liao. Haha... A cut on my finger, grazed by a paintball. A shot on arm, and 2 on the leg. Totally couldn't feel it, until i saw the red marks.

Richard got one neck shot. He pain till, until now he still sore. Haha... Sian.. I got his neckshot pic. But stupid NTU/blogspot isn't allowing me to do the upload. Think i do it tomorrow or something!

Future? Present?

2006-03-16T00:29:00.000+08:00

Recently momentum to study has started, but its chugging like a worn out train. Huffing and puffing to keep going. Sometimes even pausing for a rest. But guess its better than nothing...

Was watching tv just now. Saw this superstar thingy. 2 guys competing to be champions tt kind. Pity the pretty girl Alicia got kicked out. She has a sunshine smile. I like... Haha... Basically i like girls with a nice smile lar. Who doesn't?

Anyway, their acting not fantastic. And look kinda awkward on tv, to say the least. But who am i to criticize? Looking at myself, i barely have anything to be proud of.
But lets try to name several of my achievements, shall we?
1) Registered my 1,000,000,000 kill in dota a couple of days ago
2) 1 month to exams and i'm in the middle of nowhere
3) Manage to jog 1 round around the whole school without dying
4) Survived the harsh Singapore educational system to make it to NTU unscathed
5) Hmm... I can eat a whole pack of chips in 5mins
6) Uh.... I sleep 8 hours a day
7) Ah... I can fall asleep in lectures within 5mins

Woohoo... That's no easy feat to accomplish in a short 24 years alright. Gasp in awe at my unparalleled achievments! Haha... Beat that!

Just did some superhero test. They said i'm Green Lantern. Initially i hear liao i quite sad. I mean. WTF is GREEN LANTERN? He sounds weak... The Hua told me he damn powerful. Destroy the universe liao then recreate, no other superhero can stop him. Machiam God like that.

If he's so powerful, then i'll take the title of Green Lantern lar. But i'll change the damn title. Make it more sart ki.

Hmm... LordLantern sounds good. LL in short form... Or maybe Lord of Lanterns, abbre LoL? haha... Tough choice!

Friends Are Good

2006-03-13T00:40:00.000+08:00

Finally got the damn lappy running. Thanks to Hua... He did like everything. Power! Thanks. Haha...

Come to think of it. If i lived in my world, i would probably have died long ago. Here comes an irony that just crossed my mind. If friends actually help you so much, irregardless of whether you are a fucker or not, why is it that friends get placed second the moment we get into a relationship?

I did this once, and lost a fair bit of friends. Lucky my bestest buddy never left. And after i lost this girl i loved so dearly, i hooked up with a bunch of great friends. Despite all the problems heaven has thrown at me, it never ill treated me. Blessed in a certain sense, and i'm grateful.

Just watched a Hyori mv. She's damn hot, she look damn slutty, and i damn like her. Muhahahaha!!!! I shall dispense with my generosity by sharing the link to you despos out there. Enjoy!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PoMTOLVz00Q

And no more SHE. They have been on the charts for more than a week. And i should relax on my moves, no? I proudly present 第一个清晨.
Snippet of the lyrics:
这是爱
我们的爱
还不确定却好实
在把你贴在胸怀
静静的代替表白
才不愿放开

Long Day, Am I Happy?

2006-03-12T02:49:00.000+08:00

Just got back from MOS. Want to recap the entire day, whilst i still can remember the details...

Woke up damn early to give tuition. A guy's got to eat, and at age 24, i rather not stretch out my hand to demand allowance from parents like a small kid. I live on my earnings. Period.

Went to the Suntec IT fair after that. The place was packed, but i enjoyed the company. The place was squeezy, but i didn't mind. Loads of hairy people were brushing their sweat soaked arms at me, and i didn't care. I didn't have a single bite since 7pm the previous day and i didn't care. It was fun, and it was fun.

Finally had my first bite of the day. In Swensons at about 5. Decent meal, but considering my fatigued state, anything woould probably have tasted nice. Haha... Tried to have fondue at Haagen Daz, but was told its like out of stock. And every other table had a fondue at their table. How is it that when its my turn, its Out Of STock!?!?!?!

Ended up with some melon ice crean in a melon. Was great. The taste was excellent and the scraping of melon flesh was fun. Haha... Caught a movie after that, and it sucked.

Date Movie. Funny at times, left me lost the rest of the other times. Wasn't the best show i've seen this year, but i enjoyed it. Prolly cause of the company too. haha...

Met Toe and Damien for MOS slightly after. Bought alcohol off the shelves at 7-11. How power! Had another 2 cups inside MOS. The place is big, and ambience was good. Anything with decent music, chicks and alcohol is always good. Lol...

As usual, the music sounded funny. RnB was like the only thing that sounded right. Even the crowd in there is right. The other rooms never appeared to be as happening.

In all, MOS is good. Guessed i was too worn out to totally enjoy the experience. And wasn't really in the mood lar.

I realised certain things today. People are wierd. I'm not willing to splurge on good stuffs for myself. But i willingly splurge it on others, on my hobbies and many other pointless things, without even batting an eyelid.

No regrets, but only a slight tinge of sadness, that things had to turn out this way. But i realise that it could be worse lor. Maybe things are meant to be this way, just like the lack of motivation my life.

Worse. My damn MMC card died on me today. Along with it, went my contacts and everything else. How bad can life get? First my lappy, now my hp. What's next? Throw your worst at me. I'll go down fighting. Basically there's not much left, no life, no hp, no lappy, not much friends, and definately no gf, so how bad can worst be?

Hellish Week

2006-03-10T11:04:00.000+08:00

My lappy chuized. HDD crashed in front of my face and i couldn't do anything about it. Okok... i admit i didn't treat it all that well. Never did maintenance, and neglected its welfare by keeping it on hours on the end, testing its limits. And it decided to die on me.

Retribution at its best. It took out the thing that has been bringing me ALL the entertainment, and forced me into obscurity. No msn, no movies, no dota, no golf, no nothing. Not even songs. How sad!

Now... To the repairs of my beloved lappy... There was no rescuing. The HDD died, crashed, burned. No recovery, no reformatting could be done to save it, despite my best efforts.
Went down to Hp service centre. Service was excellent, and i found no cause for complaints. Kudos to HP!

I took the hint from heaven that i've been a bad boy, so i took to a little studying and discovered i could do it. And could even squeeze like tv time... Enlightenment dawned. I CAN live without the damn laptop. But i still missed it.

But i suspect all the stuff in my lappy is gone. Its sad and painful, but i guess what's not meant to be never will be. Hai...

Life Stories

2006-03-06T19:49:00.000+08:00

Weekend was cool. Went to pa pool and lan. Even went for supper. Had chilli crab and calamari for supper. Hmm.. Okok... There was beer too. Haha!

Had to rush through the bloody assignment last night. Super last minute, cause today early morning gotta hand in liao. Luckily its all over liao. Can have a short breather before i try to play catch up with tutorials... If i ever get to starting on it. Hee...

Life stories... Everyone has to grow up. Some take a longer time, some wake up their ideas fairly quickly. Guys don't suffer from the myraid of problems plaguing girls: No money buy clothes, today not pretty enough, how come he never call me, what should i eat later, do i look fat... yadda yadda, etc etc...

Guys: Money, family, girls. Simply put, we're simple. Haha... There are the jerks and there are the nice guys. I'm just generalizing. Money and family problems are uncontrollable. We don't have money. Full Stop. Family problems, cannot be helped, hard to solve with a single person's might/will.

Girl problems are self inflicted. Feel sad cause the girl is ignoring you. Feel pain cause you realise your gf no longer loves you/no time for you. Got rejected. So on so forth...
This kind of pain is fun but it hurts real bad. What's meant to be will be i guess. As if the girl knows you are going through all this torment.

I don't like this pointing of fingers. Just wanna write. And this topic just happened to come floating by.

Acherly, its cause someone i know is in pain lar. So i just wanna say. Cheer up!!

Comparisons

2006-03-04T02:07:00.000+08:00

Recently, hua was telling me say that my contents not very good. As a result, i hardly get readers, comments and tags. Does blogging really have to be so interactive?
I mean, it'll be great to have amazing viewership like so many other blogs, would be great to have many people tagging you...

Looking at my blog, i'm fairly satisfied. Its true the contents aren't very mass appeal, even mundane... But it's exactly what i'm thinking, i'm feeling. And basically, i write to muse, complain, scold at anyone and everyone. I don't write to please anyone, don't write for anyone.

Lose a game, i let flow a string of vulgarities, and get sore. I don't have the right to do it? I'm not even directing those vulgarities at anyone in particular. Concerned friends tell me say its just a game. I appreciate it, but i believe its a freedom kind of thing. And sad to say, i don't feel for a lot of things.

Hmm... Went jogging yesterday. Long time never jog, suddenly jog, like quite fun. Haha... Ric and Hua fit max. Run fast run long... Sian. Think maybe cause run too long too far liao, Hua become sot sot one... Tried to box me and Ric... I see liao very scared. Somemore same room. Haha...

No Motivation

2006-03-02T20:59:00.000+08:00

Finally finished the damn quiz and the stupid presentation. I is shack. Got another assignment due but really no mood that kind. And its totally, solely my fault. Cause i did nothing last week. Its payback time and i hate it.

And this week passed fast. How come tomorrow is friday i haven't figure out yet, but yes, tomorrow IS friday. And i'm still trying to get back to my comfort zone of doing nothing. This kind of laziness shock even myself. Haha...

I was at the airport last friday to send my parents off. When i was leaving the place, i saw throngs of small little kids, barely primary 1. Seemed like an excursion organised by their school.

They were laughing and jostling. Made to hold hands as they walk in pairs. Carefree, happy. Innocent laughters that kind. Something long forgotten, long lost by you and me. And i could almost remember how it felt like.

At that age, i used to play at the sand playground below my house with my friends after school. We would play catching, one leg and this amusing game called pepsi cola, where we try desperately to step on the other guy's leg.
Ever played this eraser game? Those erasers with countries' flags on it? haha...

There isn't any complicated feelings, confusing thoughts. All there was was just the want to have fun, the joy of playing a game, without another care in this world.
Since when have i been burdened by so many things. Of trying to make ends meet, of trying to play my part in the house, of so many many other things...

If this is part and parcel of growing up, i wanna be a kid again...

Argh! School. Hmm... Maybe Not...

2006-02-28T20:18:00.000+08:00

Drove back and forth from school the last 2 days. Most tired. But it was fun while it lasted lar. Haha... Freaking realised that having a car isn't all that fun afterall. The mad jams along expressways really sucks. I absolutely hate it. Lucky i got great company. Hee...

Today better. Went to town after school to makan. Had the GODLIKE mango desert with 2 very pretty gals. What more can a guy ask for? Haha! And the mango desert was so good until eat liao i smile tt kind of good.
Prolly the company also improved the taste. No? Muhaha!

On a lesser note. I realised i'm an idiot. The shit i'm digging myself in is ridiculous as i had just climbed out of one not long ago. And this particular shit i'm burying myself in is so similar to the previous one that the resemblance was uncanny. To the point of deja vu.

And it hurts to see such resemblance. I thought all this wouldn't matter anymore to me after so long. Hai...

Anyhow, the last few days has been good, but damn shack. And my bro just booked out. A levels coming out tomorrow. Hope he don't chui sia. Later end up in fucked up course like me then gone case liao. Haha...

I'm soooo dead... Got a quiz this thurs, and an assignment due on mon. And guess what? I haven't do a single thing yet. SHIT!

Anyway, here's a new song. Special recommendation that kind. I have to put it up! *wink

Breather

2006-02-25T22:19:00.000+08:00

Had dinner at Billy Boobers with a nice gal. I forgoed dinner for a couple of nights cause eating alone v sian. Somemore gotta get my lazy ass to go out buy. Without company, no chance. And this cute chick actually spotted that and volunteered company in fears of me going hungry for a third night. U faster say she how nice! I like! Haha...

Dinner was decent, but way too much to eat. Stuffed myself silly, and ended up feeling nauseous. Fairly happy night, compared to the many other nights. And i'll be meeting Toe later. He power! Suddenly i got so much company. haha...

Was driving back home just now when a van decided its a sports car and started racing me on the tiny Bedok road. I was like going at a normal speed when he super accelerated on my left side and tried to overtake me. How can lose to a van?? A VAN LEH! Might as well lose to a cyclist lor. Knn...

As everyone with common sense will know, on a small road, the cars on the bloody left travel at a measly 40-50km/h. And naturally as everyone with common sense knows, he's bound to find a pickup traveling at tortise speed on that lane. So he tried to veer onto my lane at his breakneck speed. I shone my high beam and he swerved back. Guess what. The dumb fuck swung out immediately after i passed and shone his high beam onto me. Then he tried to outrace me again. And HELLO.... He's driving a van lor. Does his pea-brain think that he can outrun a car? Mine's not a sports car lar. But knn... Losing = CHI RU.
And the result is... he ate dust. At least the dust from my wheels. haha...

Normally i considerate driver who follow the traffic rules to the tee one. Today a small exception. I promise i'll be a good boy next time.. Heehee....

Did i fail to mention it? Oh... Today's a good day. Someone just made it a good day. ^^

Alone

2006-02-25T00:32:00.000+08:00

Sent my parents to the airport today. They going to Bangkok, and they are leaving me the car, all to myself. Somehow, i find no joy in it.

I used to relish my own space, my freedom. Recently, i even found myself gawking at different cars, promising to get a car all for myself as fast as it is humanly possible. Even a 2nd hand one would do fine. I like the idea of owning a personal transport.

And now, suddenly i'm left with what i used to crave for, i'm lost. There's noone to nag at me, i can do as i please. I have a car now, i can drive anywhere i want. And i realised. I have nowhere to go, noone to go out with.

Alright alright. I do have a couple of friends who will oblige going out. But suddenly i don't feel like going out. At least not with them. I don't know why, i just feel like this. And for those i would rather go out with, they aren't free. Simply put, i'm in a predicament, and all i have to blame is myself.

It reached to a high where i just sat and stared at my com, refusing to study, refusing to do anything at all. 6pm, 7pm, 8pm, 9pm... Time passed slowly and i couldn't bring myself to even go out and get dinner when i'm starving.

Gradually, even the songs playing on the desktop sounded dull and far away. I can't even remember what songs were playing. Everything appeared numb. I couldn't feel a thing. Maybe that's how a person feels when he's dead. No pain, no emotions, can't hear anything, can't feel anything. Total and absolute emptiness, enveloping blankness.

And it isn't such a bad thing. I recall something distinctly along those lines. Without love, there is no hate. Without joy, there's no sadness. Isn't the tradeoff worthwhile?
With every joy lost, an equal pain is reduced.
With every pain lost, an equal happiness is taken away.
Take your pick.

We can see that there'll never be a perfect world where there's absolute happiness and harmony. Without understanding sadness, we wouldn't understand the joy of happiness. Its the two sides of a same coin, a double-edged blade. It can take lives, and it can save lives.

And i still didn't manage to stave off hunger pangs, even at my enlightened state of mind. And suddenly, i realised i have been way too alone for the past week. I need some company... Haha

Muah Chee

2006-02-23T01:27:00.000+08:00

This is my third official day into my holiday and i'm proud to announce that i've done ZILCH. The largest singular effort i have done to date is going to temple to help them beat and make muah chee.
And that muah chee ninpeh beat and cook the muah chee till shack... 4 hours that kind of shack.

And i'm sinking deeper and deeper into my abyss of misery. This kind of misery not easy to achieve. Combination of all the misery on this earth that kind.
Never do homework, going hungry, boredom, stress, emotional and mental trauma, self sympathy... so on and so forth. The list can go on, just like Feline Dior's Me Heart Will Go On. Nonstop kind of long.

Lucky over the years i've developed an immunity to this kind of misery. Now its just a stinging sensation only when i pay attention to it. Usually, i forget it through gaming and the occassional beer. But beer is expensive. Must go easy. Haha...

Enough of complaints. Do you hear this 一定要幸福 song in the background? This song is the MOST loser kind of song i've ever heard. Pay attention to what he sings. Is he even a guy!?! Somemore he repeats the 一定要幸福一定要幸福一定要幸福 part.

Why glorify this kind of self deprecating notions? We guys should band together and shout: 我我我我我我我我过错软弱从来不属于我!!!!!

By the way, i was browsing through my usual list of blogs when i noticed this entry from one of my friends. And guys got shot down in the face in her entry.
I agree with most of the points raised lar. But not only are guys the bastards, the jerks. Gals are as much the bitches, the sluts. That makes guys and gals even, no? And that's probably why there's so much agony everywhere.

But i'm painting a gloomy picture. Things could take a turn for the better. Like... Lemme see... me winning toto FIRST prize would be a good start to relieving the agony of this world. At least there would be one happier guy. No?

Winners I Say, Winners!

2006-02-21T00:23:00.000+08:00

Its amazing at the many different types of people that exist in this world. Some are exceptionally brilliant (me and my friends *wink), while the rest are totally stupid, ignorant, childish... blah blah... etc etc...

I was in this game where we spammed for PROs (meaning, fucking expert to the point of stunning). In came this bunch of people to challenge, and the following conversation ensued. I can't quite remember what he said, so i shall try to quote him as best i can. Lets call him X.

X: They spammed for PROs.
X: We'll kick their asses.
Us: Huh?
Us: Who's WE?

The game started and we played like shit. At least i played like shit. But was still fairly even.
Suddenly *YYY has left the game.

Left me momentarily stunned. The best enemy player has pulled plug, dced, spilt milk on his computer... yadda yadda... etc etc... And it was 4v5

Enemy: 4v5 very hard to play. GG..
*enemy quits
Becomes 3v5

X: Zeus how to play arh? (rubbish items in invent)
X: GG...
*X quits... Okok... i cant quite rem if he actually quitted, but who cares?
I thought i was supposed to get my ass whipped? Where's the whip?? Hello....

This happens almost everyday in my life... And this is crappy...

无声仿有声

2006-02-20T22:04:00.000+08:00

Finally decided to put up the songs column. Wanted to put 你们要快乐. But all i could find was the imitation singers version. And all sang like shit. I kid you not. So i had to settle for a lesser song.

Anyhow, here's the lyrics:

不懂讯息输送吗
而这次叫你真的惊讶
最美亦最真却像似假
偷泣的声音沙与哑
而你说你快乐而害怕
你不信任爱吗
和情人深深一吻来代替讲话好吗
这讯号以无声仿有声
领略时未需解码
和情人紧紧拥抱来代替讲话好吗
你快乐眼泪想洒了而不准你洒
我在旁请不要害怕
不懂得讲出心意吗
仍欠语句唇边轻轻挂
给些信心好吗
听到低泣的声音沙与哑
而我说我会来付代价
我心痛但你听到吗
凝神凝望你这串泪时
我发觉我已完全会意
而无用你的启齿

Why did i post these lyrics? Cause i realize not all people can read in cantonese. At least not me. Haha!

Till i come across something better!

If Only...

2006-02-20T01:26:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was decent fun. A whole nite of booze, so much booze till i had to refuse to drink that kind. And too much booze is good news. Haha...
The only bad news was that my wallet hurt. Booze with cab never made a good combi.

Singing was good too. Had been wanting to get to ktv to try out those songs.

Acherly was a little boring lar, until this waitress chick came around. Chicks really do liven up the place. I like! Haha...

Then Toe suggested go cheong. Made me gian max. Long long time never really went cheong liao. Lemme see... Hmm... Got like 1-2months liao lor.

Not that i dun wan go. They all working, attached. Who in the whole wide world will wanna go clubbing if your gf is sticking to you and you are enjoying every moment of it? A bird in hand is worth 2 in the bush heh? On afterthought, make it 3 birds. Haha..

About this bird in hand vs birds in bushes theory. I understand the concept, and agree that its logically sound. But why am i not practicing it?? In fact, i used to advocate this theory myself.

Again i contradict myself. Since i'm an advocate, why aren't i practicing wat i preach! Honestly, i really dunno.

Does this make me a masochist? LOL

Alamak

2006-02-17T20:50:00.000+08:00

I have sinned! Was reading the last post and realise it was ridiculous to the point of hilarious. Need to be so serious one anot! But i decided not to take it down lar. Afterall i wrote it ma. Heh

Today's a good day. I have declared it off day, and totally skipped school. In fact, i've declared it holiday since wed! Muhahaha...

This is life. The kind of life i have been looking forwards to. Slept all the way till 12, awakened by the big bright sun. Dragged my lazy ass of the big comfortable bed and warm cosy blanket. Went for brunch(Breakfast and lunch, i kid you not. Its really called brunch!)

Then saddled a bus to Tampines SAFRA for a swim. Was looking forward to see bikini babes, and the only babe there was a 60year old granny. Make it 70! How sian!

Tired myself splashing in the water, i limped to the tanning bench and tried to sleep. But the sun max hot. 5mins into the silly tanning session and i felt like a roast pig. Sat up and glanced to my side to see at least 5 other guys lying and tanning also. I mean, how the hell can they stand that mad heat?

Totally roasted, i dashed for the pool. I distinctly heard sizzling sounds when i entered the water. That's how hot it got lor!

Then swim halfway, the hot hot sun suddenly disappear. I thought it got kidnapped and looked up. Discovered the sky overcast with dark clouds. Got so fast wanna rain anot. Haven't even had enuough fun lor.
Bobian, ll suck thumb go bathe go home.

Play game all the way till dinner time. Went granny place to makan. Then realised something when i reached there. The whole day, i never even speak a single word, until i had to open my mouth to talk to my granny.
Talk about no man's an island. I jit tao become hermit. If this continues, think i'll lose my voice from underusage sia. Haha!

Crude Or Refined?

2006-02-17T01:41:00.000+08:00

Backlash... I realised i have been very crude in many many posts. As a result of feedback and self reflection, i've decided to refine my language in hope that it'll score better on the chicks' charts.

Here goes my first attempt on a new writing style... And self praise is no praise. So i decided to refrain from mentioning my brilliance and accentuating it with 'I POWERs' and 'GODLIKEs'.

Back to my attempt. Girls... Something you can't do without, and something you can't live with. At certain times, my perceptions get blurred. Let me iterate on this point before i further this with a jucier piece.
Occasionally, they appear all sweet and charming, brightening your day, bringing all the joys of the opposite gender. Next moment, they appear hostile and aloof.
Then again, my judgement sways from point to point. Living with them is a chore, to living with them is fun. Hmm... Not exactly living, rather its more like spending the time together.

This delicate balance is exceedingly hard to achieve and its definately not my cup of tea.

Now... The juice. It dawned upon me, that girls actually have this inherent sweet smell that they emit. On first whiff, they smell the same, but there are small but subtle differences between each individual. How they manage to keep sweet smelling all day has me mystified.

Afterall, the sweating under the hot sun coupled with the different kinds of smells lurking in all eateries would have washed out all trace of sweetness in any person.

Is there some secret alliance between all girls that shares the info on being sweet smelling?(at least among the normal to pretty ones. I don't go sniffing at ugly gals. Haha...) Or do they carry a unqie perfume each, hidden in their bags, taken out to spray each time they declare they need to use the ladies...
Whatever the case, does it really matter? Its for the benefits of the guys no? If not why bother to be sweet smelling? To impress other girls? LOL

Suffer my whims on this, but don't be mistaken. I don't go around sniffing at girls like a perverse idiot. It just happened that i was with a chick i fairly like. Then i noticed and registered.

Why notice and register? Cause sometimes, noticing doesn't equate to registering. Upon notice, its usually forgotten shortly after. I have such tendencies. Things not related to myself aren't important, hence the registering fails. Haha...

I'm done for the day, and looking back, this is so unlike me. I wonder if this can be considered and improvement or as a setback. But for the sake of certain people(s), and for the betterment of yours truly's image, i shall and i must preservere!

Celebrations

2006-02-15T23:51:00.000+08:00

Today marks the end of 3 greulling days of studying. Of course it calls for celebrations and i took to 4hours of golfing and 2 hours of dota.

And to top it off, i turbo play all the songs i like. And as a rule of the thumb, the songs i hear are either sad, or damn rock. And i decided on the melancholy ones.

As it turns out, sad songs has a bad impact to your mood when played too constantly, even when your spirits are high. And i've been under its subtle mind conditioning for the last 8hours... Damn...

Song of the day: 你们要快乐

Lyrics: 你哭着拿下银手链还我的时候
最近你躲我有了理由
别说我的爱让你惭愧
不配拥有珍惜不就是温柔

但你说抱歉爱上了我的好朋友
原来心酸比心痛难受
茫然的走到了门口
倔强还是念旧
我听见我回头说

你们要快乐要天长地久
你们没有错爱是自由
走出这扇门后至少我还有辽阔

你们要快乐要紧紧牵手
你们不幸福我会难过
成全最爱的人不是为了看着她寂寞

过去曾让你笑得很甜
不代表有权利要你纠结
虽然遗憾爱情也有它的季节
风不能吹就作最潇洒的落叶

Here goes... Which fucking loser says: 你们要快乐要天长地久, 你们没有错爱是自由. Much as it sounds good, which prolly will make u a martyr, aka dumb fuck masochist.

Oh fuck... I just realised got at least another 2 more similar songs with equally silly lovey dovey lyrics. Not that they suck so big time, but i seriously don't believe such things exists in this world...

V Day Huh...

2006-02-13T23:30:00.000+08:00

Just spotted Ric's blog on Vday, and decided i should contribute my 2cents worth on such silly day.

Why silly, cos i don't have a gf, and i can't seem to find one, despite my valiant efforts. Ok ok... I didn't make much of an effort. But isn't heaven supposed to pity me and drop me a pretty gal from heaven? Maybe an angel? haha...

Back to Vday. Basically, it sucks... For the Lovers, the Love-Lorns and the Desperate Singles.

For Lovers... Roses, extravagant dinners, presents. And such things don't come cheap, with those unscrupulous businessmen who never hesitates to milk an already dry cloth drier.

For the Love-Lorns(LL)... The mental and emotional pain of having someone you like, but not being able to be together. This category got 2 types of idiots.
The first type doesn't have the fucking balls to actually date out the damn girl.
The second type basically are Rejects who got slammed in the face.
Talk about losers...

The Desperate Singles(DS)... These are the kind similar to the Rejects, except that DSs are didn't get slammed on their fucking face, cos they haven found someone to slam their fucking place in the fucking first place.

I scorn at the damn idea, but no less, fell prey to this idiotic day a couple of times. Not that it actually hurts. The Lovers have it easier though. They got the company and all the other perks, except that the pocket would have taken a major beating.
The LLs are the worst lot, not only mental and emotional pain, some of the dumber LL's pockets actually took a beating along with the other pains.

I seriously suspect i either belong to the LLs or DSs, both of which sucks, and i fucking hate being in such loser categories.

Then i take a look around me. A couple of guys are happily in the love rut, cooking dinner for their gals, buying stuffs, bringing them out. I turn around to see a couple of idiots just like me. Someone even took the coming MP3003 quiz as an excuse for not having a date. HAHA...

I look and sigh at this whole charade. I scoff at the love-lorn fuckers, i scorn the lovers. I STUDY!!!!!

Birthday and Dinner

2006-02-13T17:35:00.000+08:00

Was Diana bdae celebrations yesterday, went to Partyworld to sing songs. Wasn't eventful, with the usual croakings and offpitches. Not until kissing came. Haha...

Please don't be mistaken. I had no part. I'm only an innocent bystander.

This pic power, James gotta kiss kiss bday girl! Haha...

On a side note... School still sucks. I have mucked thru one quiz, and another is due in 2 days time.. Fuck!

Decisions

2006-02-09T01:25:00.000+08:00

I realised i have very little willpower. From studying to every other aspects of my life. With weaker resolutions compared to others, i invariably take the easy route out of everything.

I choose not to study, easier route: play games.
I choose not to exercise, easier route: play games.
I choose not to go school, easier route: play games.

Then my all too brilliant but cobwebby mind starts linking it all. How come only games??? Cos games are fun and not stressful. Haha...

And my results suck. Wonder how i'm writing this? Cos i spotted my roomie frantically studying for the upcoming quizzes, while i'm happily playing games and surfing the net, oblivious to my impending doom.

I feel guilty, no less. And i'm ashamed to ask questions cause i don't know how to do tutorials is due to my slack attitude. I suck, but this sucks more... I'm stuck in a rut and sinking.

Reflectively, why am i choosing a tougher route now, something that requires effort, while i can have it easy on the other side? This issue is completely different from the studying rut. I CHOSE to trouble myself over something, and i'm having headaches over it.

Fuck. What happened to the easier route. Why didn't i take it? Cos my half fuck brain suddenly decided it wants a challenge, and have responded without considering the difficulty of it all. And once again, i'm fucking stuck.

Then it occured to me while i was playing games. My brilliant but rotting brain took this entire fiasco for a game. Well done brain. Fuck you.
Hmm.. Not exactly fiasco yet, cause i'm not yet defeated, but i haven't won and i'm sick of the game. Worse, there's no "exit game" icon in sight. I'm stranded.

Another entirely different topic. I had this bizarre dream a couple of nights ago. I was on this tour with my family when the bus stopped for us to visit this place. I went to the toilet and the entire tour group followed.
Don't ask me why they followed. Its a fucking dream...

Then when i was walking out, this fucker bumped onto me. As usual, i muttered my knns and ccbs. Then i noticed this wierd thing, that fucker i was cursing had no mouth. He had all the other human features but where the mouth was supposed to be was just pure skin.
It didn't register to me at that instant, but the this other guy with him (presumably his friend), got dissed and grabbed me by the collar.

I was pissed and started fighting back. But he lifted me easily. How in the entire fuck world is someone able to do that, when i was lashing out the way i lashed out, i had no idea.

My little bro came to my rescue. Worse, he used the other hand to lift him and hung him on the wall. How the fuck the wall had a hook in the toilet i had no idea.

My parents came rushing over and i got free. Being brilliant, it didn't occur to me to run. I mean. Who in his right mind would fight these creatures? One had superhuman strength and immune to damage, while the other.. well.. had no mouth.

Instead, i dashed forward, fists swinging, legs kicking. And my punches just bounced off him.
I awoke momentarily to discover myself punching my bed. No wonder i couldn't win, he was my mattress. WTF.
But it didn't occur to me again that i prolly couldn't win. I immediately closed my eyes and tried to get back into the dream. I wanted to show the fucker who's boss. I wanted to beat the shit out of the seemingly invincible foe.

Fuck, recently kena a lot of all these wierd dreams. Somemore i'm not responding normally. Seriously, i think i overwork my brain. Or maybe its that fucking tough task i have in hand that is screwing my thought processes.

Should i trudge ahead with this hard task? Or should i just give up and go back to my previously carefree and relaxed lifestyle. Fuck, this is hard...

Great Saturday, Lousy Other Days

2006-02-06T22:40:00.000+08:00

Met my army friends on Saturday evening. Did dinner at Prinsep before discovering we ran out of programs. Some wanted lan, some hated lan. Finally settled for drinks at Plasma.

Long time no see, really feels great. Those old times of getting pissed at superiors, talking cock, running out of camp to play starcraft, squatting in bunk playing Risk, chao genging... Those were the days!
Didn't quite like my stint in army while i was in it, but now that i'm out, thinking back, it was fun. It had the extras and tekaning, but its all part and parcel of life!

Finally did dinner at the malay stall nearby. Even managed to squeeze out a couple of pics!

Me, Edwin aka Hum Sap Lo, Ziyang, Chun Ser aka Upperstudy

On a lower note, school sucks. 2 quizzes due next week and everyday is xiong day. Fuck... Bring the beer and gal anyday...

Beauty of Words

2006-02-04T00:32:00.000+08:00

Finally handed in the damn project. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

I spotted now school getting more hectic liao. Projects due, quizzes around the corner. How the fuck am i supposed to have time to play games and relax sia??

Somemore now kena fever, cannot even type properly liao, much less think properly...

Anyway, recently i found this song in my computer. Didn't even realise how it got there, but there it is. 周传雄 is the singer, but the blind guy from the singapore show also got sing. naturally, the former is better.

The song: 男人海洋

Lyrics:

当我抱着你的时候
窗外风起黄叶飘落
以为是浪漫原来只是
有心在飞走

不懂情人心里想的
爱就瞎了也迷路了
想摸索什么摸到了
你手心的沉默

最痴情的男人像海洋
爱在风暴里逞强
苦还是风平浪静的模样
卷起了依恋那么长
挥手目送你启航
到你觉得我给不了的天堂

温柔的男人像海洋
爱在关键时隐藏
而心酸汇集都敞开胸膛
做远远看护的月光
不做阻挡你的墙
我的爱是折下自己的翅膀送给你飞翔

不懂情人心里想的
爱就瞎了也迷路
了想摸索什么
摸到了你手心的沉默

最痴情的男人像海洋
爱在风暴里逞强
苦还是风平浪静的模样
卷起了依恋那么长
挥手目送你启航
到你觉得我给不了的天堂

温柔的男人像海洋
爱在关键时隐藏
而心酸汇集都敞开胸膛
做远远看护的月光
不做阻挡你的墙
我的爱是折下自己的翅膀送给你飞翔

最痴情的男人像海洋
爱在风暴里逞强
苦还是风平浪静的模样
卷起了依恋那么长
挥手目送你启航
到你觉得我给不了的天堂

温柔的男人像海洋
爱在关键时隐藏
而心酸汇集都敞开胸膛
做远远看护的月光
不做阻挡你的墙
我的爱是折下自己的翅膀送给你飞翔

The lyrics power! "我的爱是折下自己的翅膀送给你飞翔" How power can 爱 get? His imagination and level of Chinese jit tao pawn me till i blur. Even dream, i also cannot dream of such power words lor. heh...

Then again.. Who's interested in my 翅膀s? Haha...

Life of A Bookworm

2006-02-03T03:07:00.000+08:00

Alright, we are all familiar with being a slacker, playing games all day, eating good food, sleeping. At least that's the case for me. For as long as i could remember, i never really sat down to actually study, if it's not because of exams.

Now, i have this assignment due today. And being the usual slouch, i resisted all attempts to actually start on this piece of crap until today. And lo and behold, ahead of me stood this chai. Ok... Maybe she isn't that chai, but in MAE, the standards are considerably different from norms.

So there i was, dreading the work, while this chai actually bothered to scan the question paper so that i could see it before the meeting. Not that i actually did anything to that rubbish i received.

Worse, she came prepared and had actually attempted to do the ridiculously tough assignment. And i couldn't even figure how she managed to answer part (a). Ever had feelings of inferiority? I felt so small...
Ok lar.. Not that small, maybe smaller by about 1% that kind. Haha...

Worried that my image of being a nice guy and hardworking student might be smashed, i took off to the library for the next 2 hours to try and comprehend the seemingly complex subject.

2 hours later, i emerged a stronger man, of both mind and body, armed with my newly acquired knowledge, ready to take on the world and beyond.
We went to find the tutor for help, even though i felt like i could answer all the tough assignment questions.

Guess what, i happen to be self-delusional idiot who actually stared at the damn notes for 2 hours, believing i had studied and understood, cause, i didn't understand a single word of what the tutor said.
Okok... I did do a little studying... And i did understand about half of what the tutor said. But things weren't as simple as i thought it to be. Fuck studying....

Then now, i just spent like 4 hours doing the damn assignment and plotting the fucking graph. And i think my entire night's work is in vain, cause i don't think i got it correct. KNN lar... Should have just fucking played dota lor...

Chinese New Year

2006-01-29T02:28:00.000+08:00

Its 2 hours 33mins since the 'new year' has started and i must say i'm enjoying the start of this brand new year. The usual routine started out with being conscripted to our usual temple. For as long as i can remember, this is a long and dreary affair of kneeling and praying and kneeling and praying.

And what can you expect from temples? Uncles and aunties, no less. And its quite a bore.

But this year is different! The uncles and aunties brought their daughters. Muhahahaha. Some quite chai lor. A boring routine of praying at a temple becomes a chick fest. At a temple somemore... Think GuanYin will be angry with me liao...

Never really expected chicks there. Usually chicks go churches one lor. nice to see buddhist chicks... Brings more spark to an otherwise mundane affair. Haha...

Back to the chinese new year concept.

Personally, i don't relish going from place to places, meeting total strangers and greeting them the same verse:'Happy new year'. There's totally nothing to say and you hang around making small talk like:"Your sofa very comfortable hor?" "Today weather very hot."

What's the whole point of that? Immediate relatives which i have more contact with, going over for the new year would be an obligation. Its afterall chinese new year. But for those i don't even know their names, its pointless.

Point made. Being brilliant, i came up with an excellent concept that saves us all the time and effort, probably even embarrassment.

First, we have each of our contacts in our phonebooks. When its chinese new year, we sms each other:" Happy Chinese New Year! May you strike toto and 4d all at once, and your business trive for the year to come! Gong xi gong xi. By the way, my bank account number is XXX-XXXXX-X, posb savings... Please transfer my ang bao money there. Thanks! ^^. PS. Got time meet for a drink ok?"

There, i've settled the hassle of chinese new year, and retained all the perks of the festive season. Man... Sometimes i impress even myself...

Live and Learn

2006-01-24T20:30:00.000+08:00

Recently came across a story on the internet. Too much stereotyping of guys as bastards and girls as the ones getting the lousier part of the deal.

Normal tv or movies would portray this guy, who ill treats the gal. But the gal likes the guy a lot. This would leave the naive audiences gasping in disbelief at the grieviances of the gal and start sympathizing at her predicament. Some dumber ones would even praise her devotion.

My cue? The girl is dumb. The guy is a bastard, no less, but bastards are ruling the world now. Good guys die early. Take for example, Georges Brush. Do you believe he came to power through being a nice guy through and through, by having people helping him? I wonder how many guys he had to step on before he got to that position.

Now.. Good and nice guys would be like Hitler. He's really a good guy. Really! He never lied about his agenda to gain power and conquer the world. In fact, he was downright straightforward and honest in his quest for world domination.

And true to my theory, Hitler died young. The former is ruling the world now...

Hmm.. Where was i? Ah, yes... The girl gains all the sympathy. Such is the case of subliminal messaging, media's form of brainwashing and mindcontrol that guys are stereotyped either as bastards or weaklings, and girls are the weaker sex by the masses.

But i beg to differ. That's all old school thoughts, attractive as it is, it is losing its strength as girls becomes bitches and guy becomes the fucking SNAGs.

Anyway, here's the story...

They have been married for two years. He loves literature, and often posts his work on the net, but nobody ever reads them. He is also into photography, and he handle their wedding photos. He loves her very much. Likewise with her. She has a quick temper, and always bullies him. He is a gentleman, and always gives in to her. Today, she's being"wilful" again.

Her : "Why can't you be the photographer for my friend's wedding?
Her: She promised she'd pay."
Him : "I don't have time that day."
Her :"Humph!"
Him : "Huh?"
Her : "Don't have time? Write less of those novels, and you will
have all the time you need."
Him : "I...someone will definitely recognize my work some day."
Her : "Humph! I don't care, you'll have to do it for her.
Him : "No."
Her : "Just this once?"
Him : "No."
Negotiation's broken.
So, she gave the final warning: "Give me a Yes within three days, or else..."

First day. She "withheld" the kitchen, bathroom, computer, refrigerator, television, hi-fi...Except the double-bed, to show her "benevolence". Of course, she has to sleep on it too. He didn't mind, as he still has some cash in his pockets.

Second day. She conducted a raid and removed everything from his pockets, and warned, "Seek any external help, and you bear the consequences." He's nervous now. Night. On the bed. He begs for mercy, hoping that she'll end this state. She doesn't give a damn. No way am I giving in, whatever he says. Until he agrees.

Third day. Night. On the Bed. He's lying on the bed, looking to one side. She's lying on the bed, looking to the other side.

Him : "We need to talk."
Her : "Unless it's about the wedding, forget it."
Him : "It's something very important."
She remains silent.
Him :"Let's get a divorce."
She did not believe her ears.
Him : "I got to know a girl."
She's totally angry, and wanted to hit him. But she held it down, wanting to let him finish. But her eyes already felt wet. He took a photo out from his chest. Probably from his undershirt pocket, that's the only place she didn't go through yesterday. How careless.

Him : "She's a nice girl." Her tears fell.
Him : "She has a good personality too." She's heartbroken, because he puts a photo of some other girl "close to his heart".
Him : "She says that she'll support me fully in my pursue for literature after we got married." She's very jealous, because she said the same thing in the past.
Him : "She loves me truly. " She wishes to sit up and scream at him :"Don't I?"
Him : "So, I think she won't force me to do something that I don't want to do."
She's thinking, but the rage won't subside.
Him : "Want to take a look at the photo I took for her?"
Her : ".....!"
He brings the photo before her eyes.She's in a total rage, hits his hand away and leaves a burning mark of a slap on his face. He sighs. She cries. He puts the photo back to his pocket. She pulls her hand back under the blanket. He turns off the light,and sleeps. She turns on the light, and sits up. He's asleep. She lost sleep. She regrets treating him the way she treated him. She cried again, and thought about a lot of things. She wants to wake him up. She wants to have a intimate talk with him. She doesn't want to push him anymore. She stares at his chest. She wants to see how the girl looks. She slips the photo out. She wanted to cry, and she wanted to laugh. It's a nicely taken photo of herself. A photo he took for her. She bends down, and kissed him on his cheek. He smiled. He was just pretending to be asleep.

This guy's nice lar. But he's CHI RU. Kena abuse until so jialat. As all once-upon-a-time story, its a happy ending. You think it happens in real life? Guess not...

Played Too Much Games

2006-01-23T20:12:00.000+08:00

This is bad. I woke up this morning to realised i had been dreaming of playing burbenog. 2 totally different dreams connected as one. Its damn bizarre...

First, this gal friend of mine told me say she broke up with her bf. Then i had to try to stop her from killing herself.
I was on my way home to play games when i heard the news, so i rushed to the damn hospital, which is fucking far from my place. Then i had to stop a series of suicide attempts like cajoling her not to swallow cans and cans of pills, and to put down the damn knife. Then had to prevent a jump-off-high-rise-building attempt.
By that time i got damn pissed cos i wanted to get home for a game. And this was wasting a lot of precious gaming time. Guessed i stayed prolly cos she's cute lar. Would be a waste for such people to die... Haha...

Finally managed to subdue her. How? I have no idea.
Then amazingly, i'm home and playing...
Playing what? Burbenog.. -.-'' Was even wondering what to build, what to buy. OMG

Guess i played way too much games. Damn... Rush home to play game meh.

Anyway, i got those malaysia pics liao. But fucking a lot. So posting only the "chai" bartendress pics and those in the lousy pub. On 2nd thoughts, she isn't that chi anymore lar. Prolly drank too much that night...

And to top this off, the bartendress can sing damn well... And i'm sure she'll look better if she lets her hair down. Haha...
And dumb bitches, don't play suicide...

Lazy Or Confused?

2006-01-20T22:31:00.000+08:00

I'm a bum. For the last 5 days in school, i only went to lessons for 3days and stayed holed up in my warm cosy room watching movies, playing golf and basically just rotting for the other 2.

Rotting and slacking is a great form of leisure, not to be undertaken by the faint hearted. It saps away all the determination and willpower of the individual.
Having been through this process countless of times, i must say its good, cause anything else requires effort. And making an effort takes a lot of determination, something which i badly need, but never having enough to go around.

Alright. I'm finding excuses for being a bum. So what?

Tell you bummers a secret. I'm always envious of those people with loads of friends cause they seem to be having a lot of fun. I'm usually alone, if not then its with the same couple of friends.

As much envious of those popular and outgoing guys, i love my personal space and time. Cannot imagining spending so much time socializing. Making friends takes time. Getting to know them takes time. Going out with them takes time. And i need lots of time to rot and relax. Inevitably, slacking seems like a much better choice, the other requires way too much effort.

So why am i complaining? Cause i like to whine. I like to bitch about things. If i can have lots of friends and have a lot of fun with them, but dun need the effort and i can dump them anytime i want, you say how power! All the perks of having fun and slacking all put into one nice package!

But i digress... There's one group of people i wouldn't mind spending time with. Hmm.. Make it 2 groups. 1 have now, another one i would like to have.

First group definitely is my gaming cum drinking friends. Meet them occasionally and they are great fun. No less!

Second group naturally is a group of pretty girls. Going out with pretty girls, making friends with them, naturally would become a fun process well worth the effort. Of course, this is a group which every single guy would wanna be in.
Faggots fuck off.

I mean.. Girls are usually spiteful. Pretty girls are usually worse. They usually would have these small misgivings among their own group, but keep stowed in their narrow hearts, hating each other to the core, but smiling and acting as if they're great friends. Such hypocrisy exist in each and every one of them to a certain extent, and pretty ones usually exhibit more of it.

A small spark can just set off these tons of spitfire into one big major explosion where faces are spat at and backstabbing occurs. I've seen this happen and i'm totally disgusted. You girls should learn to be more magnanimous...

But then again, a group of pretty girls is good... Ah...

Jogging

2006-01-19T21:22:00.000+08:00

The past fews weeks of rain totally zapped my get fit determination. Finally brought my lazy ass to go for a small jog. I kid you not, but getting ready and going for the jog is harder than the actualy jogging process.

Did one big big round around school and almost perished before reaching the room. Jun hua damn fit... Knn...

But still no issue. While doing the jog, i overtook a bus, 2 birds and 3 motorbikes, not to mention having loads of gawking girls cheering me on. My brilliance aside, the jog was a tiring one. It's tough to impress so many people at the same time.
Or was i panting like a dog and running like a 50yr old uncle...

Internal Conflict

2006-01-14T01:46:00.000+08:00

I realised that i suffer from conflicting interest everyday. I want to stay in my room play game and watch shows and movies everyday. But there's this nagging need to do tutorials and go for lectures..

Then this devil and angel scenario always happens. Needless to say, the devil usually wins. Who can struggle against the lure of booze, women and pleasure? The angel gets stomped flat and goes into hiding.

But this angel has 2 very good buddies called time and guilt. Guilt would nag at you cause u didn't fufil your so called "duties" imposed by family and society called studying. Then time would sneak up on you when u are in the midst of having your fun when u realise you didn't fucking do a single tutorial and you've got like 10000000 projects and assignments to hand in, coupled with exams around the corner.

Why am i whining? Cause i have failed loads of subjects in the past few years and now am on the brink of studying more than 4 years. Every semester now is a nightmare with loads of projects and tutorials and lectures, from 830 in the freaking morning to 830 at the fucking evening.

After one week of such tormentous regimental lifestyle, i'm now sitting in the comfort of my cosy room complaining to myself that my life suck... Ok, i lied.. Working sucks more. HAHA... At least i can skip lectures and miss tutorials. Projects can be completed hastily and exams can be passed if effort is put in.

Work on the other hand has only 1 perk. The $$... Otherwise, its 365 days a year, minus holidays and weekends of pure torture. it sucks the spark out of every living human being lor.. I had this opportunity to experience this kind of lousy lifestyle and i must say, it sucks way more than studying.

So why am i whining here? Cause this is MY blog. Heh...

Advice

2006-01-11T02:58:00.000+08:00

Was suffering from a minor hiccup in my life, a kind of minor decision making that would affect myself for time to come. Actually, i had sorta came to a decision, but needed a 2nd opinion, maybe even a third.

Naturally, if i could have things my way, i would have the cake and eat it. But it wasn't a simple personal choice, but something of a personal choice vs morals. Usually, morals aren't much of an issue, since i'm a selfish person, but this moral issue would affect next few years.

Don't quite catch what i'm saying? Of course, cause i cannot actually voice out the entire problem. Not because i don't dare to, but cause people ARE reading the crap i'm writing and its not my own personal diary. I have a certain standing to maintain..

Anyway, i got to a decision. (I had actually decided long ago) And thanks to Injenue, i double confirmed my ideas. Haha.. Its really great to have someone to talk to!

But most things are easier said than done. I realise in the course of certain actions, some people will be affected, and i might turn out in worse stead than before. Ironically, things might also become better. Everything at my fingertips and i'm not used to wielding such kind of power, cause :
With great power comes great responsibility.

And i hate responsiblilty... It would be nice to be a bastard and fuck the responsibility part, but i'm a nice guy. I can't bring myself to be a bastard. Sigh, its so tough being a good guy..

Anyway, it behooves me to make decisions that would affect many things. But isn't this a process of growing up? Suddenly i realise growing up is painful. Pardon my melancholy mood to this entry. Its late and i'm not thinking straight. (I'm lying again. I'm wide awake and having moodswings like a damn girl. Fuck)

Suddenly i don't feel like writing anymore. Ciaoz

Busy Busy Week

2006-01-07T16:24:00.000+08:00

School finally started. Started out with a scare though. The damn timetable couldn't get fixed and had to keep finding the subject coordinator to help me. Eventually i fucked myself up when i dropped my LAB accidentally. Jit tao panic cause cannot add back.

Ran all the way from hall to North spine to find that Ms Madeline to help me again. Bet she wondering how come got so dumbo fella in uni. She smile smile, but ended up helping me with all the registration.
At long long last, timetable fixed. And it took a whole 1week lor. But i walked back hostel in the rain. Totally wet, underwear soaked that kind of wet. Fuck!

Went to send my little bro off to Tekong on Thursday. The surroundings not much change, but the stuffs they issuing our recruits are getting better and better. Somemore got gloves for holding rifles. Think one day they'll probably issue tissue packets and gameboys. Haha.

But Tekong is still Tekong, got the fuckings and the pumpings, got the sweat and the lousy food. Ate the cookhouse food, same thing as the one i ate 5 years ago lor. They claimed it has improved though, say it provides all the nutrition and whatnot the modern soldier needs.

Their stage lines used still the same. They also promised safety is of the utmost importance. They had better mean it lor. My little bro is inside now. I got quarrel and fight with him last time lar, but he's my one and only bro. Wanna kill also is i kill, not army lor..

Anyhow, he inside for a few days can come out liao, never kena confinement. Lucky bastard..

Everyday he call home that kind. Don't know is he miss home or he don't want my parents to worry. But still quite sian lar. Stuck in a miserable island, gotta march, do pushups, kena fuck, eat lousy food, wash your own clothes, and worse, cannot sleep in your own comfortable bed at home.
Somemore gotta draw rifle, gotta clean the damn thing, gotta sleep at 2230 wake at 0530, last but not least, no com, no internet, nothing.

Still can remember last time i go Tekong. Before that always pia go out gai gai, play games, sing song. But come back from Tekong on weekends, home best. Food never tasted better and staying home never felt warmer.
But i'm lucky, i got a fairly good family, if not for the never ending naggings.

Yesterday was one of the better days i had this week. Met up with the guys for dinner and ktv at Plasma, and of course the drinking. Topped the night off with a game at lanshop and tim sum supper at Desker.
The game at lanshop wasn't very fair though, but my team won. Isn't that all that should matter? Hahaha!!
Tim sum at Desker was also good, Injen intro the stuff usually good one lar. The talk cock session was damn funny at certain points, but guess won't sound funny if i write it here. Those who knows knows, those who don't, too bad. Heh.

New Year Every Year

2006-01-01T19:17:00.000+08:00

Promised my buddy to be at Plasma yesterday, went down though i would rather rot at home. Recently not much motivation to go out, somemore not as if there's any chai over there.

Anyway, got my ass over there and had my drinks. If there's anything looking forward to, its the drinks. Now that my buddy got girlfriend liao, he got more busy. Not that i always stick with him, cause once buddies forever buddies. Girlfriends don't last quite as long. Heh...

Had this lucky draw over at Plasma, 2 hampers for 2 lucky bastards. I happen to be unlucky saint. No luck there... Then came along this middle aged man, giving out 2 tickets to hongkong as extra prize, right from his own pocket. Rich fuck... If only i had this kind of godfather! Me godfather chui chui, see him like see stranger that kind. KNN...

Eventually got bored and wanted to head home. Guess what, Orchard Road FUCKING CROWDED. Wanna take a cab home also cannot find lor. At least 100000000000 cabs drove past me and none stopped.
Finally got fed up and tried to call a cab. Guess what again? Instead of the usual:"Please wait while we connect you. Our operators are all bust at the moment." It was:"DDDDDOOOOOOOO!!!!" WTF! Busy tone is so damn fucked up, especially when you are sweating in the middle of orchard road in the middle of the night, wanting to go home for a nice warm shower and comfortable sleep.

In the meanwhile, thousands of bangalahs walk past me, drunk and rowdy. Usually bangalahs isn't much of an issue, since i'm NOT a racist. But these bangalahs are dangerous and should be put behind bars for the safety of the public. They were drunk and rowdy, and were armed with bottles and bottles of spray cans.
Believe you me, these people are the scrouge of the earth. And the spray cans are not normal spray cans. The cans are the FOAM type, not the line type. And they sprayed on me. FUCKING HELL! The fucker who spray on me obviously was drunk, why would a guy spray at another guy? And why me!
Other more somber bangalahs took the chance to spray on girls. The guys around those girls were either small and weak, or were pussies. Cause they did not say or do anything to help or protect the girl. Wimps... But the bangalahs got like 99999999999999999 of them lar. Killing one means u gotta fight off the remaining 99999999999999998. Not very wise. Even an idiot would know the odds are stacked.

Anyway got home and had my shower and sleep. Cleaned out my hostel room. the reality of school starting soon sunk in my brilliant but stubborn brain. Its time to start studying!

Extinction Of Men?

2005-12-30T14:44:00.000+08:00

I was reading a disturbing article on called: A World Without Men. Besides quoting some dumb fuck books on fictional reasons why men would cease to exist in this world, there was also scientific proof that Men, are on the decline.

It was said that Y chromosomes are what that dictate a baby becomes a boy or a girl, and that particular Y chromosome is degenerating and becoming weaker, with more men becoming impotent and the increasing rise of women.

Some of the Pro-women, anti-male reasons:
1) More women, even some girlie-men are rising and carrying out an anti-men movement.(where, i don't have the slightest idea)
2) Men are deemed strong, aggressive, unemotional, with no contribution at all.
3) A stressful modern life coupled with a high level of sedentary activity is weaken male potency.
4) Men are referred to as 'nature's sole mistake'
5) Genetic programming, artificial insemmination or cloning could replace men.
There are a couple more reasons but i'm lazy to list all of them. Anyway this article struck me as one-sided and dumb.

If it wasn't for men, do you think you girls could be reading my article now? Do you think you all would have discovered that thing called the Y and X chromosomes? For christ's sake, the reason why u are sitting in a comfortable cushioned seat with ari con and fans blowing at ur face is because of US, MEN.

If men were become weak, emotional and all wussy, what is it that seperates us from girls?
Food for thought for you biased readers. If reproduction can be done by genetic programming, artificial insemmination or cloning, the same could happen to the ladies. They can just all fade away and be done with. Then WE GUYS could do genetics and stuffs to make our babies if we need, and clones of pretty girls solely for our own whims and fancies.
So who decides who stays on earth and who doesn't? I don't favour MCP, but i don't favour those feminist who thinks they own this world. Its for everyone to live in together lor.

Its true guys aren't perfect, but aren't ALL of us the same? Being all emotional and wimpy all the time just doesn't cut it, and if there were no guys, where's that shoulder to cry on? Where's that person to make u feel all safe and protected? A clone? Oh, wake up...

Ineffectual Bastards

2005-12-28T11:37:00.000+08:00

Got to fucking plan my timetable... Realised coordinating with many people quite tough. Some of them had to sacrifice what they actually wanted to accomodate everyone else.

Then came the time to register. Guess what. NONE of it went through. I mean, WTF! Just because one of my bao subject cannot go thru means everything else also cannot? How fucking STUPID is that?

Ended up with a damn lousy timetable. And i realised its totally different from everyone else except for one person. Despite my state of du lanness now, i must say i really appreciate that! Its good to have some1 sticking by despite these trying times.

Others totally just couldn't fit in and had to register in other time slots. And i'm sure its sure to suck. If the school had the fucking brains and willing to spend a little more extra effort, they could have easily set the time and date for the damn lessons like in JC, SEC and even PRI schools lor.
Instead they choose to split the damn thing apart and ask us to register ourselves. And the timing is fucked up and totally student-unfriendly, not to mention there's the agony of planning.

Every semester gotta go through this kind of frantic planning.
Step 1: Plan and try to coordinate with friends.
Step 2: Pray hard to get wanted slots, if not, everything else clashes.
Step 3: Try damn hard to be first few to register, always failing miserably.
Step 4: Get damn upset cos timetable is fucked up, not to mention will be all alone entire sem and gotta wake up damn early every morning for lesson.
Step 5: Get pissed into convulsions before falling asleep drooling...

I LOVE NTU. Daddy said if i said otherwise will kena sued. I don't want kena peh in jail... Nnnoooooo!!!!

Merry Christmas & A Pleasant Surprise

2005-12-26T19:29:00.000+08:00

Went out on Xmas eve with gaming friends to The Loof. It was BM's tiuz and the crowd there were mostly strangers. But still it was good fun and the ambience there not bad. The open rooftop idea was a novelty.

But the drinks fucking ex. I ordered a Magaritas and the cup was damn small, not to mention it didn't taste good and it cost me 18SGD. This kind of high end stuff is not for poor dudes like me. Seriously, I could do better with a jug of beer.

Wanted to make it down to Plasma before midnight to join my buddy. But the guys tu damn long, ended up i entered Christmas in a Kopitiam eating eggs and toast with kopi.

By the time reach Plasma, already late liao. Most of the fun ended. But still, i discovered my buddy found a gal! Somemore they love love and they also bao bao lor. How power! My this buddy is the never have a gf type before.

But then they not officially together yet lar. From the looks of it, more or less le. Haha... Here's a love love pic of them!

Ok. Enough of them. Let's talk about me. I got a major problem on hand now. Hai. Laterz

Old Friends, PART 2!

2005-12-23T16:08:00.000+08:00

Just received this batch of photos from my other friend from the gathering. I thought they took dozens of photos lor. Maybe she took out those she didn't look nice in. Vain girls... Haha!

By the way, Shin's damn good. Sings damn well and makes it look easy. You guys should really go appreciate them. Here's the lyrics from one of their songs. I wonder if it can be seen...

一辈子两个人在一起

你说要加个或许

不是你不喜欢甜言和蜜语

只是你比较实际

两个人一辈子不分离

你问我好在哪里

不是你不期待永恒的恋曲

你说最美的爱情叫做回应

为何连分手都不跟我争吵

撂下一句话就想逃跑

让我爱难平恨难消情难灭梦难了心难过

你却放手一了百了

离开我你说是为了我好

可知道这句话伤人不少

就算忘不了没有大不了

反正一切都不再重要

我的心既然你全都不了

何必再继续让彼此困扰

斩断纠缠的爱

从今就一了百了

Old Friends

2005-12-21T18:35:00.000+08:00

Went for my primary school friends gathering yesterday. Ages since we last met, easily more than 1 year. And the 2nd in like 10 years.

Had dinner at Fish and Co. While waiting for everyone to arrive, small talk was in order for those present. Many of us has changed here and there, but everyone's overall personailty sort of stuck since the last i could remember.

The gals had accomplishments to their names, working and with degrees of diplomas, some even second upper lor. A couple of the guys had signed off, one of them was even making it big as a sales engineer.

I'm a straggler in the group. But i have my fair share of accomplishments. My DOTA skills are legendary, i got a level 130++ mmorpg character in A3, i owe NTU 5 modules and i landed myself a decent place to stay in hall 14. My my... This list could go on forever, but i decide to stop short here.

By the way, here are the pictures...

In between the small talk, i went off into my own dimension once again. Spaced off in my own thoughts, many things hit me..

Once small ignorant kids, we have grown. Not just in size, but in thoughts as well. Bickering and verbal fights and teasing still ensued even though we totally lost contact with each other. It really feels good to see so many of them once again. My kiddy buddies, goli frenz and quarreling mates all gathered!

An idea i had been toying hit me once again... Pardon my despondent mood but, with a gain of something, another thing is lost. Maturity comes at a price of innocence. Knowledge comes with the price at the loss of the bliss of ignorance.
Such things are inevitable in the process we call 'life', and its saddening and joyful all at the same time. Mixed conflicting feelings are the hardest to deal with.

Gone were the days of talking too much in class till kena the 'stand-up' punishment, rushing off to the nearby mama shop to buy tikum and dragonball cards, playing catching at the sand playground below the hdb flats near school, using erasers to fight each other during breaks, and the joy of having a yakult in hand.
Yakults come a dime a dozen now, eraser fights are a distant memory, the sand playground is gone, the mama shop has stopped selling tikum and cards and i don't even go lessons now. Haha... Those were the days.

Back And Kicking

2005-12-19T23:20:00.000+08:00

Finally got my ass back in Singapore. Took loads of photos. Think uploading them all is going to take me all day. -.-''

Genting damn cold. Then i didn't bring jacket or anything. Almost died there. Lucky casino fun. Jackpot as usual sucks, but the table gambling pawns! And the table games easy to play.

The dices love me! Muhaha. Won a couple of tens and then shack liao. Play casino i think must pia pia 1 whole day that kind then fun.

For the first time in my life, i took to serious shopping. Armed with 600Ringgit, i took to conquering KL. And i spent every single cent of it.. Heh! I power! Shopping isn't such a chore afterall.

Had lots of time to observe things i never had the chance to observe. And i got disgusted with many of the things i noticed. Lets start shall we?

Some people like to lament the fact that they are fat, and despite their continuous efforts to eat lesser, the kilos never seem to go off. While other people can eat all they want and still stay slim.

I'm not much of a slim guy, but fuck you. I write what i want. I have this friend who eats not a lot. But likes those fucking sweet stuffs. Bread has to go loaded with kaya butter and jam. Cannot drink plain water, die die must drink those sweet drinks like peach tea and coke. Then complain fat. I mean... WHAT THE FUCK?

Then those who eat a lot but not get fat? I realise they eat a lot, but not all are those fattening stuffs. Vegetables get swallowed by kilos and everything goes. Drink loads of plain water also. This, i respect. They are slim cause they eat slim. Its not just quantity we are talking here. Its what you eat and drink!

Since i've started, i got loads of grouses. Don't think i got the stamina to write all at one shot anyway. Another time then. And meanwhile, fuck you whiney bastards.

Making Merry In KL

2005-12-18T01:35:00.000+08:00

Now i'm sitting in a pub in KL drinking beer, shots, cocktails and making merry! I POWER! Haha....

This holiday trip is totally cool. Genting was decent, i won a couple of tens and the whole place like in air con that kind. Then i never bring jacket. Damn cold lor. Then don't dare venture out cos really cold.

Did lots of shopping. Resolved to changed my baggy jeans wardrobe. This is really going to cost me. And i realised shopping is decent fun! But really very shack.

Just finished a 10 course dinner meal in Federal Hotel. Got sharks fin lor... 32++ RM is decent! Prolly might go for supper later! Heh! Come back confirm fat one. -.-''

There's this bartenderess/chai in this pub. She sings great and she quite chai. Now me considering getting a Malaysian gf. Muhahahaha!!! Hmm... On second thoughts, long distance relationship not really my kind... >.<

Took LOADS of photos. Gotta spend lots of time to sort thru and post! Later guys!